The little things to remember

Losing weight is such a huge (hate to use the word!) journey, you come across so many things along the way and I think its important to take note of them.

I weigh the same now as I did when I first met Elf Man.  I still remember sitting in my bedroom, listening to music, getting extremely drunk - with this extremely TALL man I had met on the internet and that was the first time I had met him in real life.

As I had been left with no self-confidence in my first marriage (which had ended only 3 months before!) I asked Elf Man if he was disappointed with how I looked, since you know, I was ugly and 83kg so not slim.

He told me - and I remember it like it was yesterday - that he thought I was "fuckin' hot actually'.

How those little compliments stay with you - just an off the cuff comment I'm sure by him, but it meant so much to me to hear those three little words.  It was like someone had given me the best gift ever, after living with someone for over 5 years and continuously feeling bad about myself, that I was ugly, not worthy of love, not worthy of sex - it took basically a random stranger to turn it all around.  Of course, he might just have been pissed, or just trying to get into bed with me........

*cough cough*

So while I'm the same weight now, and my body definitely doesn't look the same after 4 babies in 4 years - its nice to remember this weight in a good way, and not just that I have 17kg to go to get to my goal.

If only one person in the world finds you beautiful (or, you know, fuckin' hot), it doesn't really matter what anyone else thinks, because you'll always have that to hold close to your heart.

(Ps....and marry that person so you can hear it often heehee)