So I've been VERY relaxed with my eating over the xmas period (and a bit before that to be completely honest) so I've decided that I am setting myself a new challenge and I am going to complete it. I know I've said that a lot, and I know my lovely husband doesn't really have any faith in me, but I am going to complete it.
I've already started preparing for Paleo life, got my choc mint balls to snack on if I feel like something sweet, made almond milk this morning with my new nut milk bag I got for xmas, and I'm testing a new breakfast cereal tomorrow to see if I like it to add to my other options for breakfast (can't eat eggs all the time!)
I've got a referral to get my bloods taken as well, so I was planning on doing that and then going back at the end of 112 days and getting them retested.
Why 112 days? Well, it takes me to the 23rd April - when I started this whole weight loss "journey". So it seemed fitting that I take it to my anniversary of weight loss, and hopefully will be 65kg then. Eventually I want to get down to 60kg, I think thats pretty realistic.
So that starts on 1st January. Now I have to go finish off my homemade pizza, garlic bread and beer. Cos you know, I'm going without for 112 days....
Saturday, 29 December 2012
Friday, 14 December 2012
Day 5
First day of school holidays!
Had oats for breakfast as normal, with blueberries and raspberries. So nice!
Morning tea: I was so very tempted to have one of the kids fruit bars, but knowing me and my habit of not being able to stop at just one - I had one of their rice crackers, and then had two plain ryvitas instead. My body will thank me for this, I'm sure.
Lunch: Two scrambled eggs on a thick piece of wholemeal bread (toasted). Nothing added except for salt. No oil in the pan, no milk in the eggs, no butter on the bread.
Afternoon tea: A few dry ryvitas and some raw brownie. Found the recipe online HERE and of course I had to test it! Yummo, although I think it has a touch too much salt, just in case anyone reads this and wants to make it - halve the salt. And this is coming from someone who adores salt.
Dinner: Spaghetti bog tonight but with zoodles instead of spaghetti or pasta.
After dinner: We made ice cream based on THIS recipe, except I didn't want to put nuts in it, so I just used frozen banana and then thought I would use dates instead of nuts, and that kills two birds with one stone, then I don't need the sweetener if I use dates! My dates are kept in the fridge so now I have banana chocolate ice cream with pieces of super chewy fudgy dates throughout it. Definitely a treat! And super healthy and YUM!
Oh and I also had a few low fat biscuits with my tea ;) And I could have had another brownie. Whoops.
Had oats for breakfast as normal, with blueberries and raspberries. So nice!
Morning tea: I was so very tempted to have one of the kids fruit bars, but knowing me and my habit of not being able to stop at just one - I had one of their rice crackers, and then had two plain ryvitas instead. My body will thank me for this, I'm sure.
Lunch: Two scrambled eggs on a thick piece of wholemeal bread (toasted). Nothing added except for salt. No oil in the pan, no milk in the eggs, no butter on the bread.
Afternoon tea: A few dry ryvitas and some raw brownie. Found the recipe online HERE and of course I had to test it! Yummo, although I think it has a touch too much salt, just in case anyone reads this and wants to make it - halve the salt. And this is coming from someone who adores salt.
Dinner: Spaghetti bog tonight but with zoodles instead of spaghetti or pasta.
After dinner: We made ice cream based on THIS recipe, except I didn't want to put nuts in it, so I just used frozen banana and then thought I would use dates instead of nuts, and that kills two birds with one stone, then I don't need the sweetener if I use dates! My dates are kept in the fridge so now I have banana chocolate ice cream with pieces of super chewy fudgy dates throughout it. Definitely a treat! And super healthy and YUM!
Oh and I also had a few low fat biscuits with my tea ;) And I could have had another brownie. Whoops.
Thursday, 13 December 2012
Day four
Day 4, Sparrow's last day of term so it probably won't be great eating since I have to go to his xmas party.
Breakfast: I had some grain free cereal left over from my paleo days so I had that and some low fat yoghurt. Then I looked at the ingredients of the yoghurt after eating it and realised it has some pretty nasty shit in it, so now I'll be looking for a better yoghurt to eat.
Morning tea: Had a small handful of grapes, a few slices of watermelon and ryvitas with hommus.
Lunch: Went to Sparrow's school but DIDN'T have anything that was on offer, no matter how nice the cupcakes/cakes/sausage rolls looked - I didn't eat a thing. So I came home after the school concert and made myself some wholemeal toast with tuna (and a bit of mayo) and spinach between them.
Afternoon tea: Apple. And some grapes while putting kids to bed and preparing dinner.
Dinner: Pork steak things and lots of vegies (sweet potato, pumpkin, carrots, beans and broccoli)
After dinner: Fruit & Yoghurt ice cream and some sweet biscuits with my nightly tea.
Coffee intake: 3
Tea intake: 2
Water intake: Just over 1L I think!
Still no exercise. Grr.
Breakfast: I had some grain free cereal left over from my paleo days so I had that and some low fat yoghurt. Then I looked at the ingredients of the yoghurt after eating it and realised it has some pretty nasty shit in it, so now I'll be looking for a better yoghurt to eat.
Morning tea: Had a small handful of grapes, a few slices of watermelon and ryvitas with hommus.
Lunch: Went to Sparrow's school but DIDN'T have anything that was on offer, no matter how nice the cupcakes/cakes/sausage rolls looked - I didn't eat a thing. So I came home after the school concert and made myself some wholemeal toast with tuna (and a bit of mayo) and spinach between them.
Afternoon tea: Apple. And some grapes while putting kids to bed and preparing dinner.
Dinner: Pork steak things and lots of vegies (sweet potato, pumpkin, carrots, beans and broccoli)
After dinner: Fruit & Yoghurt ice cream and some sweet biscuits with my nightly tea.
Coffee intake: 3
Tea intake: 2
Water intake: Just over 1L I think!
Still no exercise. Grr.
Wednesday, 12 December 2012
Day three
Bubbles was feeding like a newborn last night, so I'm pretty tired again today, but really thats nothing unusual! As tired as I am, thats still no excuse to feed my body bad food. (Even though I would really love some!)
Breakfast: Oats. Except I threw in some frozen raspberries with the frozen blueberries to soak with the oats and it was so YUM!! So I had raspberries instead of strawberries - still with coconut, linseeds and sunflower seeds (banana and honey as well).
Morning tea: Even though I was super proud of myself for getting through shopping (both Aldi and Woolworths) with the three girls, I didn't indulge in any of the marshmallows I got for them for being so good. Instead I had a handful of cherries (on spesh this week at woolies!) and then when I got home, had my hommus on ryvitas again.
Lunch: Sardines on toast. One of my most favourite lunches I think!
Afternoon tea: A cherry, banana and a nectarine (and more cherries before putting the kids to bed just cos they are so freaking yummy)
Tea: Pork San Choy Bau (or in other words, Savoury pork in lettuce cups) - one of my favourite meals, so freakin yum!!!
After dinner: Fruit and yoghurt ice cream, and a couple of low calorie biscuits with my tea.
Water intake: around a litre...ish...
Coffee intake: 3
Tea intake: 2
Bring on day 4! I CAN do this.
Breakfast: Oats. Except I threw in some frozen raspberries with the frozen blueberries to soak with the oats and it was so YUM!! So I had raspberries instead of strawberries - still with coconut, linseeds and sunflower seeds (banana and honey as well).
Morning tea: Even though I was super proud of myself for getting through shopping (both Aldi and Woolworths) with the three girls, I didn't indulge in any of the marshmallows I got for them for being so good. Instead I had a handful of cherries (on spesh this week at woolies!) and then when I got home, had my hommus on ryvitas again.
Lunch: Sardines on toast. One of my most favourite lunches I think!
Afternoon tea: A cherry, banana and a nectarine (and more cherries before putting the kids to bed just cos they are so freaking yummy)
Tea: Pork San Choy Bau (or in other words, Savoury pork in lettuce cups) - one of my favourite meals, so freakin yum!!!
After dinner: Fruit and yoghurt ice cream, and a couple of low calorie biscuits with my tea.
Water intake: around a litre...ish...
Coffee intake: 3
Tea intake: 2
Bring on day 4! I CAN do this.
Tuesday, 11 December 2012
Day two
Ok had a shit night last night, just couldn't sleep, plus a few feeds from Bubbles - so I'm pretty tired. Determined to do well today though.
Had oats again for breakfast. Same as yesterday, just because its pretty darn yummy and with all the seeds and stuff, its a great start to the day.
Morning tea - two ryvita crackers with a light spreading of hommus and a boiled egg on top. Pretty nice actually! Plus the protein from the egg will help keep me fuller for longer :)
Lunch - another salad (still no meat, and I forgot to get some chicken out to thaw) so I had lettuce, pumpkin, beans, small handful of cashews, small sprinkling of cheese and a small handful of grapes. Interesting combination, but I liked it! I like just coming up with "interesting" combinations, keeps things different lol
Afternoon tea - apple (pink lady - my favourite!)
Dinner - pizza - however ours was on a pita bread, with homemade pizza sauce made in the thermomix (couple of cloves of garlic, a red onion and some tomatoes blitzed), with green capsicum, radishes, an egg and a light sprinkling of cheese. Elf Man had the added bonus of pepitas and cranberries on his (freak that he is!!) It probably sounds gross but it was really quite nice.
After dinner - a cup of tea and some ryvitas (better than sweet biscuits right!?)
Water intake: Around 1L - not a lot, but better than nothing (which is normal for me...)
Tea intake: 2 (one when the kids were eating their pizza for dinner, and one before bed!)
Coffee intake: 3 (one for stumbling out of bed at 5am, one at morning tea, one after lunch)
No exercise today. I had all intentions of going out and going for a walk. However - I was out the door when I realised I had someone coming around to buy a bed and I had to clean down the bed, so I did that instead. Then found out after I done it that they weren't coming any more *insert lots of swear words here* By that time, Bubbles was overdue for her nap, so I put her down instead because it looked like it was going to rain anyway. There is always tomorrow.
Had oats again for breakfast. Same as yesterday, just because its pretty darn yummy and with all the seeds and stuff, its a great start to the day.
Morning tea - two ryvita crackers with a light spreading of hommus and a boiled egg on top. Pretty nice actually! Plus the protein from the egg will help keep me fuller for longer :)
Lunch - another salad (still no meat, and I forgot to get some chicken out to thaw) so I had lettuce, pumpkin, beans, small handful of cashews, small sprinkling of cheese and a small handful of grapes. Interesting combination, but I liked it! I like just coming up with "interesting" combinations, keeps things different lol
Afternoon tea - apple (pink lady - my favourite!)
Dinner - pizza - however ours was on a pita bread, with homemade pizza sauce made in the thermomix (couple of cloves of garlic, a red onion and some tomatoes blitzed), with green capsicum, radishes, an egg and a light sprinkling of cheese. Elf Man had the added bonus of pepitas and cranberries on his (freak that he is!!) It probably sounds gross but it was really quite nice.
After dinner - a cup of tea and some ryvitas (better than sweet biscuits right!?)
Water intake: Around 1L - not a lot, but better than nothing (which is normal for me...)
Tea intake: 2 (one when the kids were eating their pizza for dinner, and one before bed!)
Coffee intake: 3 (one for stumbling out of bed at 5am, one at morning tea, one after lunch)
No exercise today. I had all intentions of going out and going for a walk. However - I was out the door when I realised I had someone coming around to buy a bed and I had to clean down the bed, so I did that instead. Then found out after I done it that they weren't coming any more *insert lots of swear words here* By that time, Bubbles was overdue for her nap, so I put her down instead because it looked like it was going to rain anyway. There is always tomorrow.
Monday, 10 December 2012
Day one
So I decided to write my blog every day so as to keep myself on track. I won't bore all my friends and post the link on facebook for them to read, because, well, this is probably going to be bloody boring, and its just for a constant reminder to myself on how to eat well, and that I already KNOW what to do, I just have to STFU and do it.
So today for breakfast I had oats. Normal quick oats, 1/3 cup. Soaked them in some water for about 15 minutes, and then put some blueberries, strawberries, linseeds, shredded coconut, sunflower seeds, half a banana and half a teaspoon of honey on it. Then added some light milk when it was done in the microwave cos it was still a bit sticky. Delicious!
I had a visitor during the morning so I didn't have anything but a cup of coffee (and a slice of apple), until I made her some vegan chocolate mousse (Quirky Cooking recipe) and I had a bit of that as well. Yes, its high in calories, but so good for you!!
Then for lunch, I was tossing up what to have, could have a sandwich with tuna, however Elf Man needed all the tins for his week at prac, and we didn't have any other meat things, so I made a salad. Lettuce, and green capsicum were my starting point. Boiled some eggs up, threw one of that in as well. Then steamed some pumpkin and green beans - threw them in as well. And then I spotted the rest of the apple that was left over on the bench - chucked that in as well. Plus water - to drink, not to float my salad.
Then afternoon tea - some homemade hommus on rye biscuits. I only discovered rye biscuits through the Ashy Bines eating plan, and I was skeptical but they are actually really yummy!
Dinner - beef stirfry - with beans, radishes, carrot, red onion and capsicum. Threw in some lime juice and tamari to flavour. On a bed of cauliflower "rice".
And finished the day with a fruit and yoghurt ice cream (my favourite) and a cup of tea (obviously not consumed at the same time).
Day one over and completed successfully with NO crap food and no craving.
Day two - I'm ready for you!
So today for breakfast I had oats. Normal quick oats, 1/3 cup. Soaked them in some water for about 15 minutes, and then put some blueberries, strawberries, linseeds, shredded coconut, sunflower seeds, half a banana and half a teaspoon of honey on it. Then added some light milk when it was done in the microwave cos it was still a bit sticky. Delicious!
I had a visitor during the morning so I didn't have anything but a cup of coffee (and a slice of apple), until I made her some vegan chocolate mousse (Quirky Cooking recipe) and I had a bit of that as well. Yes, its high in calories, but so good for you!!
Then for lunch, I was tossing up what to have, could have a sandwich with tuna, however Elf Man needed all the tins for his week at prac, and we didn't have any other meat things, so I made a salad. Lettuce, and green capsicum were my starting point. Boiled some eggs up, threw one of that in as well. Then steamed some pumpkin and green beans - threw them in as well. And then I spotted the rest of the apple that was left over on the bench - chucked that in as well. Plus water - to drink, not to float my salad.
Then afternoon tea - some homemade hommus on rye biscuits. I only discovered rye biscuits through the Ashy Bines eating plan, and I was skeptical but they are actually really yummy!
Dinner - beef stirfry - with beans, radishes, carrot, red onion and capsicum. Threw in some lime juice and tamari to flavour. On a bed of cauliflower "rice".
And finished the day with a fruit and yoghurt ice cream (my favourite) and a cup of tea (obviously not consumed at the same time).
Day one over and completed successfully with NO crap food and no craving.
Day two - I'm ready for you!
Sunday, 9 December 2012
The ugly cycle of self loathing
So many things have been running through my head about what to write in this blog post tonight. Of course like I always have been, I am going to be completely honest and admit that I have been so completely off the wagon lately that I couldn't even see the wagon. Wasn't next to me, probably in the next country or something with the way that I have been acting.
First up - my excuses. Oh, I've heard myself come out with some great ones. I can't exercise because Elf Man is on prac. Well yes, its true that he leaves at 5.15am and he gets home when I get home from school pick up at 3.30pm. Yes its true that I don't really have time to exercise in the afternoon and evening because we go to bed earlier now. HOWEVER - I could get out there with the girls in the pram and go walking during the day, nothing stopping me except my excuses. Oh and then there is the excuse to eat crap food - I have my period. Weeeeee! That means I get to eat shit food right? Well no, no it doesn't. I didn't eat any crap for 5 months and I know that I had my period at least 5 times......
So I've been eating a LOT of crap. An awful lot. Yesterday I felt so sick in the guts, and I wouldn't (couldn't) even admit to Elf Man how much crap I managed to shove into my gob at my mum's house. Eating in secret is what I do best you see, I've perfected the art of people not knowing what you are grabbing to quickly eat, and excuses are easy to come by, oh I need a drink - better go inside... where are my sunnies?.. better go inside... (handful of food, handful of food...chew quickly...swallow but don't choke...)
Hopefully I'm not alone here, I'm sure I can't be the only person alive who eats more than they are supposed to, with all the wrong food choices. Here I sit now at around 75kg and back to eating like I was before - when I was 103kg. With no feelings attached to food, if its there I eat. I'm not really an emotional eater, I'm more like - see shit food, eat shit food, kind of eater. Go buy more shit food.
I hate the way I feel at the moment. I feel "fat". Because I've eaten fat, I feel FAT. I crave more fat because I've eaten fat. I feel gross and utterly disgusted in myself, so I eat more fat. The cycle continues. I've fooled around with different methods of losing weight (and of course have noted them all in previous blog entries, previous one to this one proves my point) and I think its because of fear of failure. If I give myself a reason to fail (diet too hard to stick to, takes too much time, too restrictive, too expensive) then its not MY fault surely, its the diet's fault - right?
I'm ending this shit, I really am. I'm sick of feeling like this. Sick of being on this constant fucking merry-go-round of "Weight Issues". Its not my weight thats the issue here, its the crap in my head. My low self esteem. My low self worth. My excuses.
Tonight we are saying good bye to the crap food, and tomorrow is going to be that brand new shining day. I'm not going to think about putting crap food into my body. I AM going to beat down this wall in my mind that says I can't be fit and healthy. It knows the past me, not the future me.
And if I never get to meet the "me" that I can be - I'll be stuck with the "me" that I don't like. Forever. And that's a long time.
First up - my excuses. Oh, I've heard myself come out with some great ones. I can't exercise because Elf Man is on prac. Well yes, its true that he leaves at 5.15am and he gets home when I get home from school pick up at 3.30pm. Yes its true that I don't really have time to exercise in the afternoon and evening because we go to bed earlier now. HOWEVER - I could get out there with the girls in the pram and go walking during the day, nothing stopping me except my excuses. Oh and then there is the excuse to eat crap food - I have my period. Weeeeee! That means I get to eat shit food right? Well no, no it doesn't. I didn't eat any crap for 5 months and I know that I had my period at least 5 times......
So I've been eating a LOT of crap. An awful lot. Yesterday I felt so sick in the guts, and I wouldn't (couldn't) even admit to Elf Man how much crap I managed to shove into my gob at my mum's house. Eating in secret is what I do best you see, I've perfected the art of people not knowing what you are grabbing to quickly eat, and excuses are easy to come by, oh I need a drink - better go inside... where are my sunnies?.. better go inside... (handful of food, handful of food...chew quickly...swallow but don't choke...)
Hopefully I'm not alone here, I'm sure I can't be the only person alive who eats more than they are supposed to, with all the wrong food choices. Here I sit now at around 75kg and back to eating like I was before - when I was 103kg. With no feelings attached to food, if its there I eat. I'm not really an emotional eater, I'm more like - see shit food, eat shit food, kind of eater. Go buy more shit food.
I hate the way I feel at the moment. I feel "fat". Because I've eaten fat, I feel FAT. I crave more fat because I've eaten fat. I feel gross and utterly disgusted in myself, so I eat more fat. The cycle continues. I've fooled around with different methods of losing weight (and of course have noted them all in previous blog entries, previous one to this one proves my point) and I think its because of fear of failure. If I give myself a reason to fail (diet too hard to stick to, takes too much time, too restrictive, too expensive) then its not MY fault surely, its the diet's fault - right?
I'm ending this shit, I really am. I'm sick of feeling like this. Sick of being on this constant fucking merry-go-round of "Weight Issues". Its not my weight thats the issue here, its the crap in my head. My low self esteem. My low self worth. My excuses.
Tonight we are saying good bye to the crap food, and tomorrow is going to be that brand new shining day. I'm not going to think about putting crap food into my body. I AM going to beat down this wall in my mind that says I can't be fit and healthy. It knows the past me, not the future me.
And if I never get to meet the "me" that I can be - I'll be stuck with the "me" that I don't like. Forever. And that's a long time.
Saturday, 1 December 2012
31 Days of Clean
Ok so I've slacked off again - this weight loss stuff is hard! Its so easy to fall back into old habits and excuses. I had slacked off then found my mojo again, and then when I was preparing for a surprise trip to Tassie I sort of gave myself the excuse to just eat crap. No need to start a new diet plan because I didn't expect my friends to feed me that way you know. Didn't want to put them out because it was a surprise that I was coming. So I had already gotten slack and then when I was down there I indulged in some pretty terrific (yet calorie high) food.
SO! Now that I'm back, I've set myself a new challenge - 31 days of Clean. This is my clean eating plan for the whole of December (including Christmas yes!).
Today I woke up and instead of coffee with milk I had a herbal tea. I then made homemade Almond milk because every packaged one I found at Coles yesterday had added sugar, even the organic one which uses Agave Syrup, which has been proven to not be something that is considered clean. So I thought "fuck it" and made my own with a couple of dates to sweeten.
Then I made myself a poached egg on rye toast for breakfast. I got the idea from Ashy Bines on the rye bread, however, it has been noted on another blog that wholemeal bread is "clean" as well, so I think I will make my own wholemeal bread instead of buying rye.
Unfortunately dairy doesn't really agree with me, so I will drop milk but will still have yoghurt a few times a week (homemade yoghurt - no sugar). And of course, no pasta and rice etc. Most of my main meals are meat and vegies - with LOTS of broccoli.
I have a plan with different options for every meal and snacks, and I will stick to that. It still needs a bit of refining, there are a few different opinions out there on what exactly clean eating is, for example, Ashy Bines says her plan is a clean eating plan, however she has protein powder and bars, and if you read the guidelines on some blogs about what clean eating is - they don't fit into it. She also doesn't recommend milk - other blogs say milk is fine as long as its full fat, and others say its fine as long as its low fat. Confusing much?
Therefore, I've made my own Melcra Clean Eating Plan - everyone else is just too confusing for me, so I've taken bits and pieces from everything I have read and mixed it with stuff that I like and I know is good for me.
I weighed in this morning at 75.8kg. Shocking how easy it is to pack the weight back on. Almost too easy. I'm not weighing myself until January 1st either, just as an added challenge to myself from frequent weigh ins!
31 days - let's go!
SO! Now that I'm back, I've set myself a new challenge - 31 days of Clean. This is my clean eating plan for the whole of December (including Christmas yes!).
Today I woke up and instead of coffee with milk I had a herbal tea. I then made homemade Almond milk because every packaged one I found at Coles yesterday had added sugar, even the organic one which uses Agave Syrup, which has been proven to not be something that is considered clean. So I thought "fuck it" and made my own with a couple of dates to sweeten.
Then I made myself a poached egg on rye toast for breakfast. I got the idea from Ashy Bines on the rye bread, however, it has been noted on another blog that wholemeal bread is "clean" as well, so I think I will make my own wholemeal bread instead of buying rye.
Unfortunately dairy doesn't really agree with me, so I will drop milk but will still have yoghurt a few times a week (homemade yoghurt - no sugar). And of course, no pasta and rice etc. Most of my main meals are meat and vegies - with LOTS of broccoli.
I have a plan with different options for every meal and snacks, and I will stick to that. It still needs a bit of refining, there are a few different opinions out there on what exactly clean eating is, for example, Ashy Bines says her plan is a clean eating plan, however she has protein powder and bars, and if you read the guidelines on some blogs about what clean eating is - they don't fit into it. She also doesn't recommend milk - other blogs say milk is fine as long as its full fat, and others say its fine as long as its low fat. Confusing much?
Therefore, I've made my own Melcra Clean Eating Plan - everyone else is just too confusing for me, so I've taken bits and pieces from everything I have read and mixed it with stuff that I like and I know is good for me.
I weighed in this morning at 75.8kg. Shocking how easy it is to pack the weight back on. Almost too easy. I'm not weighing myself until January 1st either, just as an added challenge to myself from frequent weigh ins!
31 days - let's go!
Saturday, 3 November 2012
I've found my mojo again!
Yes, its been a while since I blogged, mainly because I was totally in a funk and could not fight my way out of it. I weighed in a week ago and I had put on weight. First I was so totally impressed at my 6 month weigh in because I was 71.5kg and then I decided to go sabotage myself and eat crap food, and put on over 2kg in about 9 days.
So after talking to a wonderful, inspirational friend, we got chatting about how I can't seem to get my mindset back to what it was when I first started losing weight, and she agreed that I'm not going to find it again, because I'm not the same person. WELL! That totally made sense to me, and explains why I kept going around in circles and changing up my diet plan, and then changing it again and again, and I couldn't stick to anything - I felt like I was drowning and I couldn't save myself.
So now, in the last few days, I'm getting it back again - the mindset to get FIT (and not just to lose weight). When I started losing weight it was all about the weight loss, everything I did was dictated by how much weight I had lost, and how much I wanted to lose, and how much I had left to lose. I always said that I didn't want to look like this:
I wanted to look like this:
I want to be buff, and have people comment "wow, she looks fit" instead of those negative people that say "oh wow, she's sooo skinny" - you know the ones? People are always going to talk about people, and make comments, and I know I can't control that, but I would like them to be saying the "Fit" comments most of all.
SO! I've gained a few kilos, but gained some perspective and some mojo, which was so worth it. I wrote up another plan the other day, and I'm going to revise it tonight and take out the chocolate and treats and stuff I had in there. I don't need them, I've proven to myself that I don't need chocolate to live a good healthy life. So I'm dissing that and maybe adding some more berries or something haha.
Thats my plan. Plus I'm starting swimming as from tomorrow. Someone told me today that I should do triathlons with them, and I was like - wtf?! No way man, I CANNOT do that - my hip, my knee - argh, its just not doable.
Then I was like, dude, hang on. I've gotta stop making excuses and start doing shit. I want an athletes body, and I've trimmed a lot of fat off already, so maybe I should just give myself some bloody credit and TRY some of this stuff. So I'm not going to do it immediately of course (I don't want to give myself a heart attack) but I am going to start swimming first, and also try and get my back issues worked out (back will fix hip, and will fix knee) and then I'm going to start making myself into the person that I see myself wanting to be.
I will do this. Slowly but surely I will get there.
But of course I had to get maccas out of the way for dinner tonight and finish the chocolate in the fridge. Priorities right?
So after talking to a wonderful, inspirational friend, we got chatting about how I can't seem to get my mindset back to what it was when I first started losing weight, and she agreed that I'm not going to find it again, because I'm not the same person. WELL! That totally made sense to me, and explains why I kept going around in circles and changing up my diet plan, and then changing it again and again, and I couldn't stick to anything - I felt like I was drowning and I couldn't save myself.
So now, in the last few days, I'm getting it back again - the mindset to get FIT (and not just to lose weight). When I started losing weight it was all about the weight loss, everything I did was dictated by how much weight I had lost, and how much I wanted to lose, and how much I had left to lose. I always said that I didn't want to look like this:
I wanted to look like this:
I want to be buff, and have people comment "wow, she looks fit" instead of those negative people that say "oh wow, she's sooo skinny" - you know the ones? People are always going to talk about people, and make comments, and I know I can't control that, but I would like them to be saying the "Fit" comments most of all.
SO! I've gained a few kilos, but gained some perspective and some mojo, which was so worth it. I wrote up another plan the other day, and I'm going to revise it tonight and take out the chocolate and treats and stuff I had in there. I don't need them, I've proven to myself that I don't need chocolate to live a good healthy life. So I'm dissing that and maybe adding some more berries or something haha.
Thats my plan. Plus I'm starting swimming as from tomorrow. Someone told me today that I should do triathlons with them, and I was like - wtf?! No way man, I CANNOT do that - my hip, my knee - argh, its just not doable.
Then I was like, dude, hang on. I've gotta stop making excuses and start doing shit. I want an athletes body, and I've trimmed a lot of fat off already, so maybe I should just give myself some bloody credit and TRY some of this stuff. So I'm not going to do it immediately of course (I don't want to give myself a heart attack) but I am going to start swimming first, and also try and get my back issues worked out (back will fix hip, and will fix knee) and then I'm going to start making myself into the person that I see myself wanting to be.
I will do this. Slowly but surely I will get there.
But of course I had to get maccas out of the way for dinner tonight and finish the chocolate in the fridge. Priorities right?
Monday, 8 October 2012
A few updates!
So I have a few things to get out of my head today!
First up - we weighed ourselves yesterday. Unbeknownst to us, our scales had stopped working properly around 6ish weeks ago. When I plateaued at 78kg for 3 weigh ins - although I was discouraged at the time and could never see myself getting below that weight - and now we know it was the bloody scales not working properly cos a leg fell off and they were wobbly!
So my weight is now 73.1kg (going by the wii fit). Its funny, when I was 103kg I thought that anyone who was 75ish didn't really need to lose weight, they were so lucky to not be as heavy as me - but now that I'm here, I realise that I have a LOT of weight left to lose. (See picture for evidence!)
I still have a LOT of weight around my belly and on my thighs, realistically I could probably get down to 55kg (both my mum and sister are usually this weight) and not look too skinny. I'd build muscle of course, so I would be an athletic type of body - I can't wait till I get to that point!
So my weight is 73.1kg, I've gone down to 29.87% body fat and I lost 10cm in the last month. So according to BMI calculators my BMI is 26.9 which means I'm still classed as overweight. Definitely have to keep going!
Now the next thing - I'm so over my bloating issue. When I went paleo that took that issue away, but it gave me the runs all the time. So what was causing the runs? I thought it was the lack of fibre (as compared to a diet containing grains) but maybe it was from a excessive amount of fat OR protein (excessive in comparison to what I had normally been having). Google tells me it could be either. So, do I go paleo again, but not have as much fat? We weren't eating THAT much fat, only with our bacon, I never added extra fat to things, but we did have some homemade lara bars made with coconut oil, and they were quite slimy with oil.
So I thought that since my nose is also blocked again - I'll go off dairy for a month and see if that helps. So thats my newest plan - go off dairy for the month.
And yet another thing - I've started a "No Junk Food Challenge" - so its this:
So I had day 1 today, pretty easy considering we never ate those things in the first place. Although we have no ice cream for after dinner and thats something I normally have, as well as biscuits with my evening cuppa so that should be interesting tonight after dinner!
Current weight: 73.1 kg
Total weight loss to date: 29.9kg (sooo close to 30kg)
First up - we weighed ourselves yesterday. Unbeknownst to us, our scales had stopped working properly around 6ish weeks ago. When I plateaued at 78kg for 3 weigh ins - although I was discouraged at the time and could never see myself getting below that weight - and now we know it was the bloody scales not working properly cos a leg fell off and they were wobbly!
So my weight is now 73.1kg (going by the wii fit). Its funny, when I was 103kg I thought that anyone who was 75ish didn't really need to lose weight, they were so lucky to not be as heavy as me - but now that I'm here, I realise that I have a LOT of weight left to lose. (See picture for evidence!)
I still have a LOT of weight around my belly and on my thighs, realistically I could probably get down to 55kg (both my mum and sister are usually this weight) and not look too skinny. I'd build muscle of course, so I would be an athletic type of body - I can't wait till I get to that point!
So my weight is 73.1kg, I've gone down to 29.87% body fat and I lost 10cm in the last month. So according to BMI calculators my BMI is 26.9 which means I'm still classed as overweight. Definitely have to keep going!
Now the next thing - I'm so over my bloating issue. When I went paleo that took that issue away, but it gave me the runs all the time. So what was causing the runs? I thought it was the lack of fibre (as compared to a diet containing grains) but maybe it was from a excessive amount of fat OR protein (excessive in comparison to what I had normally been having). Google tells me it could be either. So, do I go paleo again, but not have as much fat? We weren't eating THAT much fat, only with our bacon, I never added extra fat to things, but we did have some homemade lara bars made with coconut oil, and they were quite slimy with oil.
So I thought that since my nose is also blocked again - I'll go off dairy for a month and see if that helps. So thats my newest plan - go off dairy for the month.
And yet another thing - I've started a "No Junk Food Challenge" - so its this:
So I had day 1 today, pretty easy considering we never ate those things in the first place. Although we have no ice cream for after dinner and thats something I normally have, as well as biscuits with my evening cuppa so that should be interesting tonight after dinner!
Current weight: 73.1 kg
Total weight loss to date: 29.9kg (sooo close to 30kg)
Saturday, 6 October 2012
Choc orange balls
Well since I'm too scared to eat chocolate now (not that we ate a lot of it anyway obviously since starting the Melcra lifestyle), I have to look at other ways to get that chocolate in my diet (because, you know, its obviously needed as part of a well balanced diet!)
So I was thinking about the lemon balls I usually make, based on this recipe (I roll into balls instead of cutting into bars on my friend Sammie's suggestion). Then I started thinking.. hmm.. what if I used orange instead of lemon. Both citrus so should work right?
So then I started thinking... well shit, if I had orange, what goes well with orange - CHOCOLATE!!!!
So then I looked at this other recipe that I normally make for little chocolate type balls, and thought, well hell, I'll create my own!
So this is what I did -
1 cup of almonds
1.5 cups of dates
30g cacao
1 tablespoon of vanilla extract
zest of an orange (I used a new one I got the other day, washed it, dried it, then cut off with a peeler)
2.5 tablespoons of orange juice
1 cup of shredded coconut
So I let the thermomix do its job - and this is the end result!!
Some I rolled plain, some I rolled in coconut - obviously! I'm definitely no cook, or make my own inventions kinda gal, hell I had to google how to pan fry our fish tonight! But these are pretty damn good! I think the best thing is - there is no sweeteners or anything added to it, so totally paleo if we ever want to return to that kind of eating style (which we sort of follow anyway except for the odd sandwich here and there!)
The plain ones are a bit sticky, but I think I can live with that.........
So I was thinking about the lemon balls I usually make, based on this recipe (I roll into balls instead of cutting into bars on my friend Sammie's suggestion). Then I started thinking.. hmm.. what if I used orange instead of lemon. Both citrus so should work right?
So then I started thinking... well shit, if I had orange, what goes well with orange - CHOCOLATE!!!!
So then I looked at this other recipe that I normally make for little chocolate type balls, and thought, well hell, I'll create my own!
So this is what I did -
1 cup of almonds
1.5 cups of dates
30g cacao
1 tablespoon of vanilla extract
zest of an orange (I used a new one I got the other day, washed it, dried it, then cut off with a peeler)
2.5 tablespoons of orange juice
1 cup of shredded coconut
So I let the thermomix do its job - and this is the end result!!
Some I rolled plain, some I rolled in coconut - obviously! I'm definitely no cook, or make my own inventions kinda gal, hell I had to google how to pan fry our fish tonight! But these are pretty damn good! I think the best thing is - there is no sweeteners or anything added to it, so totally paleo if we ever want to return to that kind of eating style (which we sort of follow anyway except for the odd sandwich here and there!)
The plain ones are a bit sticky, but I think I can live with that.........
Friday, 5 October 2012
Goodbye old Mel
Ok so we had a pretty full on day today, and I was sooo not looking forward to the fish we were supposed to have for dinner. So I was like, god I feel like Maccas!
Elf Man said no, but agreed he didn't feel like fish either for dinner. Plus, it was sorta still frozen so that backed up our excuse for not wanting it...
So I said something about toasted cheese sangas for dinner. Then in my mind I was like - yeahhhh lots of dripping cheese, and I'll have TWO sangas, since its like dinner and everything, has to be full meal.
But then I stopped myself. FFS Mel, have you learnt nothing!? You work hard to get that weight off, and then as easy as it is to put a pair of old shoes on - back you flop into your old habits.
So I told myself no. I'm not doing that to myself, I'm a different person now and I'm NOT going back there.
So I got my arse into the kitchen and whipped up some fried rice. Of course since we avoid rice, I made it with cauliflower instead of rice. So there was onion, carrots, sweet potato, pumpkin, red and green capsicum, some sauces, celery, some eggs, chinese cabbage, chinese 5 spice and a whole cauliflower (cut up, steamed and processed like rice).
So that was dinner. Not maccas, not toasted cheese - but something very healthy, and quite yummy!
And also - my mum gave me a big container of custard (from the shops) for the kids. So I gave the kids some of that after their dinner, with the intention of having the rest with Elf Man tonight for our dessert.
But I'm not going to. I'll have our low calorie ice cream for dessert like normal (or homemade sorbet, whatever!) instead of the vanilla custard over a banana that was originally planned.
I'm not going back to Old Mel - she's gone forever.
Bye bye 103kg Mel, bye bye.
Elf Man said no, but agreed he didn't feel like fish either for dinner. Plus, it was sorta still frozen so that backed up our excuse for not wanting it...
So I said something about toasted cheese sangas for dinner. Then in my mind I was like - yeahhhh lots of dripping cheese, and I'll have TWO sangas, since its like dinner and everything, has to be full meal.
But then I stopped myself. FFS Mel, have you learnt nothing!? You work hard to get that weight off, and then as easy as it is to put a pair of old shoes on - back you flop into your old habits.
So I told myself no. I'm not doing that to myself, I'm a different person now and I'm NOT going back there.
So I got my arse into the kitchen and whipped up some fried rice. Of course since we avoid rice, I made it with cauliflower instead of rice. So there was onion, carrots, sweet potato, pumpkin, red and green capsicum, some sauces, celery, some eggs, chinese cabbage, chinese 5 spice and a whole cauliflower (cut up, steamed and processed like rice).
So that was dinner. Not maccas, not toasted cheese - but something very healthy, and quite yummy!
And also - my mum gave me a big container of custard (from the shops) for the kids. So I gave the kids some of that after their dinner, with the intention of having the rest with Elf Man tonight for our dessert.
But I'm not going to. I'll have our low calorie ice cream for dessert like normal (or homemade sorbet, whatever!) instead of the vanilla custard over a banana that was originally planned.
I'm not going back to Old Mel - she's gone forever.
Bye bye 103kg Mel, bye bye.
Sunday, 30 September 2012
Brace yourself!
Ok, so I've had knee issues that has stopped me getting on the treadmill for a little bit - I've been resorting to the cross trainer more because of it.
So yesterday, I found Elf Man's knee brace and I put it on. I could never get it on my knee before because I was too fat, so it fits now that I've lost some weight. Still tight, but I still have feeling in my toes so I don't think its cutting off any crucial circulation.
We tried out a new workout yesterday, one that took us each an hour to complete. Three sets of exercises, and each set was:
* Run for 3 minutes on the treadmill at 8km
* Jump on the cross trainer for 3 minutes at 10 degree incline and 10 resistance (keeping rpm above 63)
* Jump on rower for 3 minutes on resistance 4
* Box for 3 minutes
* 30 jumping jacks
* 10 squats
* 10 pushups
* 10 crunches
* 10 trunk extensions
Each set took 20 minutes, so one hour all up. Elf Man burnt over 1300 calories with his (which was pretty similar to my workout) but since the heart rate monitor doesn't like me, I have no idea what I burnt. I was pretty happy with the effort though.
So earlier today I braced my knee again to go on the treadmill. Previously I had been running at 10km for my intervals, but I didn't want to push it, so I ran at 9km. I usually do half an hour of my intervals (running, then walking for a minute), but I got to 23 minutes and I wasn't out of breath like I normally am, and I wasn't counting down the seconds on each run, so I thought I would push myself a little bit more.
So I kept going, still doing minute intervals, until I reached 42 minutes, then I ran until I hit 44 minutes, then walked the last minute. I was pretty stoked with that effort, usually its really hard for me to complete 1 minute, let alone 2 minutes - at the end of the workout!!!!
I felt strong, and my knee was being awesome for me - thanks knee brace!
I've also been pleased with my nutrition efforts, I am really trying to get those 2 fruit serves and 5 vegies serves per day - and I've discovered that Elf Man has a really awesome breakfast so I've been making him make it for me too. Its pretty high in calories, but its so filling that I really don't need to eat until lunch. I have a cup of coffee at morning tea, but don't actually feel hungry. It contains: half a cup of oats, some linseeds, pepitas, sunflower seeds, dried cranberries, shredded coconut, cut up fresh fruit (today was blueberries, strawberry and banana), splash of low fat yoghurt, splash of low fat milk, drizzle of honey - and zapped in the microwave for a little bit. It is SO nice, think I'll get him to make it for me every day.
On another note, it was weigh in day today, and I lost a bit too - what a freakin' awesome day.
Current weight: 75.5kg
Total weight loss (so far!): 27.5kg
So yesterday, I found Elf Man's knee brace and I put it on. I could never get it on my knee before because I was too fat, so it fits now that I've lost some weight. Still tight, but I still have feeling in my toes so I don't think its cutting off any crucial circulation.
We tried out a new workout yesterday, one that took us each an hour to complete. Three sets of exercises, and each set was:
* Run for 3 minutes on the treadmill at 8km
* Jump on the cross trainer for 3 minutes at 10 degree incline and 10 resistance (keeping rpm above 63)
* Jump on rower for 3 minutes on resistance 4
* Box for 3 minutes
* 30 jumping jacks
* 10 squats
* 10 pushups
* 10 crunches
* 10 trunk extensions
Each set took 20 minutes, so one hour all up. Elf Man burnt over 1300 calories with his (which was pretty similar to my workout) but since the heart rate monitor doesn't like me, I have no idea what I burnt. I was pretty happy with the effort though.
So earlier today I braced my knee again to go on the treadmill. Previously I had been running at 10km for my intervals, but I didn't want to push it, so I ran at 9km. I usually do half an hour of my intervals (running, then walking for a minute), but I got to 23 minutes and I wasn't out of breath like I normally am, and I wasn't counting down the seconds on each run, so I thought I would push myself a little bit more.
So I kept going, still doing minute intervals, until I reached 42 minutes, then I ran until I hit 44 minutes, then walked the last minute. I was pretty stoked with that effort, usually its really hard for me to complete 1 minute, let alone 2 minutes - at the end of the workout!!!!
I felt strong, and my knee was being awesome for me - thanks knee brace!
I've also been pleased with my nutrition efforts, I am really trying to get those 2 fruit serves and 5 vegies serves per day - and I've discovered that Elf Man has a really awesome breakfast so I've been making him make it for me too. Its pretty high in calories, but its so filling that I really don't need to eat until lunch. I have a cup of coffee at morning tea, but don't actually feel hungry. It contains: half a cup of oats, some linseeds, pepitas, sunflower seeds, dried cranberries, shredded coconut, cut up fresh fruit (today was blueberries, strawberry and banana), splash of low fat yoghurt, splash of low fat milk, drizzle of honey - and zapped in the microwave for a little bit. It is SO nice, think I'll get him to make it for me every day.
On another note, it was weigh in day today, and I lost a bit too - what a freakin' awesome day.
Current weight: 75.5kg
Total weight loss (so far!): 27.5kg
Wednesday, 26 September 2012
Back on the horse I tells ya
Ok, so 10 years ago I was married to my first husband (yes, even fat girls can have a few men interested in them in their life time!) and I was going to Vic Uni and studying legal studies. I used to ride my husband's bike to uni, because we lived about 5 blocks away. One day I was riding and I swerved to miss a little kid who jumped out in front of me, and my handle bar got stuck in a fence and the bike flipped. As did I. And then the bike landed on me and ran over my face. I was traumatised by the experience! I limped all the way to uni (crying of course like the big sook I am) and had a hug from one of my friends (I think he was a bit weirded out cos I was normally pretty tough!).
So then I got cleaned up, went to classes as usual, took the bike home (walked - I wasn't getting on that again!). So when my husband got home, I told him about the accident and expected a bit of love and affection because I was still hurting from it, and all I got was...
"IS THE BIKE OK?!"
Fuck the bike buddy - how about your wife!!
Anyhooooo....... that was the last time I went on a bike. Until today. I felt like going for a walk (6 months ago I never had those feelings) and so we put the kids in various prams, Sparrow rode his bike, and Elf Man and I headed out for a small 3.2km walk.
Then after we got back - I took one of our bikes out for a ride. Just up and down the street, and it felt so free! To have the ground so close to me whilst moving quickly was a bit scary for me, and the friggin' magpie that was attacking me was a complete pain in the arse, but it felt good to be back on there.
I'm realising that this IS a lifestyle now, and calorie counting is great and it does get you where you need to be - however its not a lifestyle you can do forever, and I wouldn't want to. So I'm going to eat good food, move my arse at least 6 times a week in various exercises, and my new goal isn't to be 65kg - its to have my legs not wobble when I walk. Too much fat on my legs and arse and I wobble - so thats my goal! To have that stop wobbling.
Forget about the scale, forget about BMI, forget about body fat percentage - my goal is to not have wobbly legs when I walk.
Good wholesome food + exercise = my wobbly jelly legs gone forever!
Well, thats the plan anyway........
So then I got cleaned up, went to classes as usual, took the bike home (walked - I wasn't getting on that again!). So when my husband got home, I told him about the accident and expected a bit of love and affection because I was still hurting from it, and all I got was...
"IS THE BIKE OK?!"
Fuck the bike buddy - how about your wife!!
Anyhooooo....... that was the last time I went on a bike. Until today. I felt like going for a walk (6 months ago I never had those feelings) and so we put the kids in various prams, Sparrow rode his bike, and Elf Man and I headed out for a small 3.2km walk.
Then after we got back - I took one of our bikes out for a ride. Just up and down the street, and it felt so free! To have the ground so close to me whilst moving quickly was a bit scary for me, and the friggin' magpie that was attacking me was a complete pain in the arse, but it felt good to be back on there.
I'm realising that this IS a lifestyle now, and calorie counting is great and it does get you where you need to be - however its not a lifestyle you can do forever, and I wouldn't want to. So I'm going to eat good food, move my arse at least 6 times a week in various exercises, and my new goal isn't to be 65kg - its to have my legs not wobble when I walk. Too much fat on my legs and arse and I wobble - so thats my goal! To have that stop wobbling.
Forget about the scale, forget about BMI, forget about body fat percentage - my goal is to not have wobbly legs when I walk.
Good wholesome food + exercise = my wobbly jelly legs gone forever!
Well, thats the plan anyway........
Monday, 24 September 2012
5 month weigh in
Ok so I've been on the "Melcra" lifestyle for 5 months now - and this is the results from good diet and exercise.
On April 23rd I looked like this:
And this:
On April 23rd I looked like this:
And this:
Now I look like this:
Yes I still have lots of flabby bits (arms, tummy and thighs I'm looking at you!) but I am proud of what I have achieved in 5 months.
And even though today I ate bread that I wouldn't normally eat, and I had soft drink and I had an iced bun - I am not going back to those first pictures.
Current weight: 76.6kg.
Wednesday, 19 September 2012
A confession
Ok so I've been absent for a bit.
On Sunday (and Monday) I had a binge. I admit it, take responsibility for it, and have suffered for it. On Monday I ate SO much food (homemade chocolate, jelly beans, other lollies, red rooster for dinner, a HUGE homemade chocolate cheesecake slice thing).. that I vomited. I forced so much crap into my system that I had the chills, shakes, vomits, the runs, I felt hot, was sweating - quite honestly I felt like I was going to die.
So while all this was going on - Elf Man was in the bedroom googling my symptoms. He said that I was having a reactive hypoglycemia. So basically I had eaten such huge amounts of sugar that my pancreas freaked out and pumped out a lot of insulin to make up for it - and it left me with low blood sugar. And since I was suffering that, I also had a panic attack (which is interesting to note that there have been some studies about the correlation between low blood sugar and panic attacks!). Then Bubbles woke up for a feed. So I had to pause what I was doing, and feed her. That was one of the lowest points of my weight issues, I created this crap that I'm suffering - AND - I did it without thinking of my family.
So it seems that even though I'm 25kg down, I still have the same issues I did when I was 103kg. My mental status is still set to excess. I'm such an addictive type of person, I get addicted to everything, I replace all addictions with another one.
So I think we've discovered that I can't have "treats". I just go overboard and it sets me off on a bad path to wanting more and more and more until I binge and then suffer. What pisses me off is that all my life I've been told that you should treat yourself now and then, and lollies/chocolate = treats. Why aren't there other foods considered "treats"- like a really nice punnet of fresh strawberries, or other fruit that you don't buy because they are too expensive, like raspberries or blueberries? Its set in everyone's mind that junk food is the only thing thats classed as a treat, and to be honest, thats fucked up. Even my mum buys shit food for my kids and calls it a treat. They wouldn't be happy with nice fresh fruit now as a treat, because they have been "treated" so many times now with lollies and junk food. Rewarded for good toilet training with jelly beans and chocolate.
So! Since all this crap started I'm revising. I was calorie counting Monday - Saturday with Sunday off. Now it appears I can't do that cos then I eat crap. So, now its been revised revised (haha) to being no calorie counting at all (it becomes an obsession) but I'm going to make sure that I'm eating the following way:
1. 2 serves of fruit every day.
2. Water. Must. Drink. More. Water.
3. 5 serves of vegies every day. Most nights I eat at least 5 different vegies, but I wouldn't class it each one being a "serve". So I have to work on eating more through the day too.
4. Palm size of meat when having it. Work on portion control.
5. Anything I eat must be fresh or homemade. I made some "Casharoos" today, a fruit and nut bar that I found online, and they are delicious! So although they are a bit calorie-high, its good food - and thats what I'm putting into me. For me. To be the best me.
6. Exercise. 6 days a week. To be fit and healthy, nothing to do with weight loss.
I was watching the biggest loser the other night (as usual) and Bob said something that really struck me. Something along the lines of those who don't celebrate and recognise every small achievement they have on their weight loss journey are usually the ones that are so focused on the end goal that they don't recognise what they have already done - therefore since they haven't recognised it, they are usually the ones to put all the weight back on.
So - yay for me losing 25kg already. I may have at least 13 to go, but I'm working on my mental state now, because that needs it more than my body does.
Current weight (as of 16 September): 77.1kg.
Total weight loss (since March 2012): 25.9kg
On Sunday (and Monday) I had a binge. I admit it, take responsibility for it, and have suffered for it. On Monday I ate SO much food (homemade chocolate, jelly beans, other lollies, red rooster for dinner, a HUGE homemade chocolate cheesecake slice thing).. that I vomited. I forced so much crap into my system that I had the chills, shakes, vomits, the runs, I felt hot, was sweating - quite honestly I felt like I was going to die.
So while all this was going on - Elf Man was in the bedroom googling my symptoms. He said that I was having a reactive hypoglycemia. So basically I had eaten such huge amounts of sugar that my pancreas freaked out and pumped out a lot of insulin to make up for it - and it left me with low blood sugar. And since I was suffering that, I also had a panic attack (which is interesting to note that there have been some studies about the correlation between low blood sugar and panic attacks!). Then Bubbles woke up for a feed. So I had to pause what I was doing, and feed her. That was one of the lowest points of my weight issues, I created this crap that I'm suffering - AND - I did it without thinking of my family.
So it seems that even though I'm 25kg down, I still have the same issues I did when I was 103kg. My mental status is still set to excess. I'm such an addictive type of person, I get addicted to everything, I replace all addictions with another one.
So I think we've discovered that I can't have "treats". I just go overboard and it sets me off on a bad path to wanting more and more and more until I binge and then suffer. What pisses me off is that all my life I've been told that you should treat yourself now and then, and lollies/chocolate = treats. Why aren't there other foods considered "treats"- like a really nice punnet of fresh strawberries, or other fruit that you don't buy because they are too expensive, like raspberries or blueberries? Its set in everyone's mind that junk food is the only thing thats classed as a treat, and to be honest, thats fucked up. Even my mum buys shit food for my kids and calls it a treat. They wouldn't be happy with nice fresh fruit now as a treat, because they have been "treated" so many times now with lollies and junk food. Rewarded for good toilet training with jelly beans and chocolate.
So! Since all this crap started I'm revising. I was calorie counting Monday - Saturday with Sunday off. Now it appears I can't do that cos then I eat crap. So, now its been revised revised (haha) to being no calorie counting at all (it becomes an obsession) but I'm going to make sure that I'm eating the following way:
1. 2 serves of fruit every day.
2. Water. Must. Drink. More. Water.
3. 5 serves of vegies every day. Most nights I eat at least 5 different vegies, but I wouldn't class it each one being a "serve". So I have to work on eating more through the day too.
4. Palm size of meat when having it. Work on portion control.
5. Anything I eat must be fresh or homemade. I made some "Casharoos" today, a fruit and nut bar that I found online, and they are delicious! So although they are a bit calorie-high, its good food - and thats what I'm putting into me. For me. To be the best me.
6. Exercise. 6 days a week. To be fit and healthy, nothing to do with weight loss.
I was watching the biggest loser the other night (as usual) and Bob said something that really struck me. Something along the lines of those who don't celebrate and recognise every small achievement they have on their weight loss journey are usually the ones that are so focused on the end goal that they don't recognise what they have already done - therefore since they haven't recognised it, they are usually the ones to put all the weight back on.
So - yay for me losing 25kg already. I may have at least 13 to go, but I'm working on my mental state now, because that needs it more than my body does.
Current weight (as of 16 September): 77.1kg.
Total weight loss (since March 2012): 25.9kg
Monday, 3 September 2012
An update - back to basics
Ok so first up I will confess and say we didn't finish the whole 30 challenge. We really did give it a good go, but we quit for two reasons.
1) I was sick of having the runs. Yup, it's out there - I felt like I had IBS again, I had to run to the toilet to avoid disaster and I hate that feeling.
2) I was looking at treats too much. Since you are so restricted, you go looking for stuff you can have, which led me to treats that replace normal foods. However they are so high in calories - its not good for weight loss. I hated obsessing about foods.
I also obsessed about food when calorie counting. So we are going back to basics - back to what worked for the first 10kg. Just good food.
No lollies, chocolate, chips, takeaway food - you get the idea. If I want white potatoes, I'm going to have them. We will stick with the cauliflower rice instead of regular rice, and zucchini instead of pasta, but that's only because we like it, not because it's paleo or low carb or whatever.
So I'm going to get up at 6am to exercise and I'm going to write out an exercise plan for the week. I weighed in yesterday and I still have a way to go, so I'm not going to let myself lose focus.
Current weight: 78kg
Total weight lost to date: 25kg (I'm recognising that I was 103 in March instead of ignoring that achievement of losing 3kg the month before I officially started)
Weight left to lose: 13kg
1) I was sick of having the runs. Yup, it's out there - I felt like I had IBS again, I had to run to the toilet to avoid disaster and I hate that feeling.
2) I was looking at treats too much. Since you are so restricted, you go looking for stuff you can have, which led me to treats that replace normal foods. However they are so high in calories - its not good for weight loss. I hated obsessing about foods.
I also obsessed about food when calorie counting. So we are going back to basics - back to what worked for the first 10kg. Just good food.
No lollies, chocolate, chips, takeaway food - you get the idea. If I want white potatoes, I'm going to have them. We will stick with the cauliflower rice instead of regular rice, and zucchini instead of pasta, but that's only because we like it, not because it's paleo or low carb or whatever.
So I'm going to get up at 6am to exercise and I'm going to write out an exercise plan for the week. I weighed in yesterday and I still have a way to go, so I'm not going to let myself lose focus.
Current weight: 78kg
Total weight lost to date: 25kg (I'm recognising that I was 103 in March instead of ignoring that achievement of losing 3kg the month before I officially started)
Weight left to lose: 13kg
Sunday, 26 August 2012
Day 14
Nearly half way through the challenge and I can feel my resolve slipping, I want to have honey and some other little things that you are allowed on the normal paleo diet, but not the whole 30! Ahh dear. You're not supposed to make any paleo treats, but we did up some biscuits today (macadamia, currant and apple biscuits) and of course we had to taste test them, and they are quite nice. Light and fluffy, and a bit coconutty, so they are definitely acceptable in this house! But, I would imagine they are classed as a "treat" so probably shouldn't be eating them......
Anyhooooo.....
Last night we went to my brother's house - twas our nephew's birthday celebration. So of course there was soft drink, bucketloads of lollies, chips, some other chip looking things, pizza, sausage rolls, party pies... and ice cream cake! Oh, and don't forget the marshmallows toasted over the fire....
So Elf Man and I had a huge apple each for afternoon tea, then the turkey meatballs for dinner that I had made earlier that day. My sister in law made a nice salad to go with their lasagna (omg it looked bloody awesome) so we had some salad on the side. Then when everyone else was having ice cream cake (kids) or cheesecake (adults), we had some strawberries, blueberries, kiwi fruit and some grapes in a bowl.
So we successfully kept to our paleo challenge there.
Today we had bacon, eggs, tomato and spinach for breakfast. Think I made the bacon too crispy, if thats possible!!!! Then we had our biscuits for morning tea (and also a muffin that I made yesterday with apples, bananas and some other healthy goodness!).
Lunch was a salad with spinach, lettuce, cucumber, bean sprouts, dried cranberries, cashews and some chicken that I baked in the oven after doing the biscuits. Simple but yum!
Dinner is a spanish omelette, I took a recipe from Simple Food Ideas and made it paleo - took out the processed sausage and put in ham, took out the white potato and put in sweet potato, and took out the peas and put in asparagus. Its yum. So thats our dinner, along with some vegies on the side.
Elf Man is trying to kill us though - he made a chocolate ice cream tonight for the kids and put frozen jelly in it as well. Damn you, Elf Man. Damn you! *shakes fist* Can't wait till the 30 days are over so we can make up some ice cream of our own - coconut milk and cacao - chocolate ice cream - thank you very much!!
Anyhooooo.....
Last night we went to my brother's house - twas our nephew's birthday celebration. So of course there was soft drink, bucketloads of lollies, chips, some other chip looking things, pizza, sausage rolls, party pies... and ice cream cake! Oh, and don't forget the marshmallows toasted over the fire....
So Elf Man and I had a huge apple each for afternoon tea, then the turkey meatballs for dinner that I had made earlier that day. My sister in law made a nice salad to go with their lasagna (omg it looked bloody awesome) so we had some salad on the side. Then when everyone else was having ice cream cake (kids) or cheesecake (adults), we had some strawberries, blueberries, kiwi fruit and some grapes in a bowl.
So we successfully kept to our paleo challenge there.
Today we had bacon, eggs, tomato and spinach for breakfast. Think I made the bacon too crispy, if thats possible!!!! Then we had our biscuits for morning tea (and also a muffin that I made yesterday with apples, bananas and some other healthy goodness!).
Lunch was a salad with spinach, lettuce, cucumber, bean sprouts, dried cranberries, cashews and some chicken that I baked in the oven after doing the biscuits. Simple but yum!
Dinner is a spanish omelette, I took a recipe from Simple Food Ideas and made it paleo - took out the processed sausage and put in ham, took out the white potato and put in sweet potato, and took out the peas and put in asparagus. Its yum. So thats our dinner, along with some vegies on the side.
Elf Man is trying to kill us though - he made a chocolate ice cream tonight for the kids and put frozen jelly in it as well. Damn you, Elf Man. Damn you! *shakes fist* Can't wait till the 30 days are over so we can make up some ice cream of our own - coconut milk and cacao - chocolate ice cream - thank you very much!!
Friday, 24 August 2012
A bit behind!
I'm a bit behind days, however, have been eating sort of the same stuff and forgetting to take pictures so haven't bothered blogging about it. So now I'm up to Day 12 of the Whole 30 Challenge, and still going well. Haven't touched the dried apricots (although the dried craisins and sultanas we won't mention!)
Today I've had a green smoothie for breakfast, then I skipped morning tea (wasn't hungry) and then I had some fried ham (dry fried in the pan, no oil) and some scrambled eggs for lunch. The girls had scrambled eggs too.
A handful of almonds for afternoon tea, and for dinner we are having fish and chips (nile perch and sweet potato chips, probably a bit of pumpkin and carrot too).
We have been talking about where we go diet wise once we finish the whole 30. We both feel better without grains and dairy, but we have some issues with the theory behind Paleo (the whole caveman didn't eat rice for one, cos you can't prove it really, there's no evidence either way!) and we also have issues with the Primal Blueprint - mainly the animal fat and bad cholesterol content. And yes, I know Mark Sisson says not to fear the fat and its good fat - well, its true, some of it is good fat (nuts, seeds, avocado, coconut) - however there's still saturated fat, and with heart disease still being the biggest killer in our generation - I'm not going to risk my heart health because some dude on the net assures me on his blog that its ok. Yes we need some saturated fat and 'bad'cholesterol (to transport fat to the certain organs that need its protection ie the heart and kidneys). But we need a higher unsaturated/saturated fat ratio in our diets. And since he puts animal fats (or saturated) so high up on his foods to eat, it IS scary to me.
Plus - all the treats that are on the Paleo blogs now - they are nice to look at and drool over, but are extremely high in calories, so its hard to figure out if people are doing it for their health or because its a new "fad" in the diet industry?
SO - where does that leave us. Somewhere in the middle. We like the idea of eating clean and putting good stuff into our body, but without heaps of animal fats and calories. I still like the idea of having chick peas in our diet, I think they offer a great deal nutritionally (and even Mark puts them in his sometimes foods, along with chocolate and wine) so I think we will have our own version of Paleo/Primal, however, it will be our Melcra lifestyle.
So far we haven't discussed too much (Elf Man has been busy with assignments and stuff) but we agreed on the sweeteners we would allow - pure maple syrup (not maple syrup flavouring!), honey and coconut palm sugar. Coconut palm sugar is a super food that is low gi, so we think its a wise choice above all other sweeteners.
Basically, we will make as much of our own stuff as possible, I'll make paleo treats for the kids instead of the rubbish I usually buy them at the shops (goodbye tiny teddies, fruit bars, fruit rolls, muesli bars) and I'll also continue to make my own butter and yoghurt - at least cutting down on some of the preservatives in their diet.
And I thought I would make things out of spelt grain instead of wheat, and see if that helps Coo's bloating issues that she has. This may be a Whole30 challenge, but I think its also challenging the way that we look and feel about food.
Anyway, thats the latest crap that has been flying around my head!
Today I've had a green smoothie for breakfast, then I skipped morning tea (wasn't hungry) and then I had some fried ham (dry fried in the pan, no oil) and some scrambled eggs for lunch. The girls had scrambled eggs too.
A handful of almonds for afternoon tea, and for dinner we are having fish and chips (nile perch and sweet potato chips, probably a bit of pumpkin and carrot too).
We have been talking about where we go diet wise once we finish the whole 30. We both feel better without grains and dairy, but we have some issues with the theory behind Paleo (the whole caveman didn't eat rice for one, cos you can't prove it really, there's no evidence either way!) and we also have issues with the Primal Blueprint - mainly the animal fat and bad cholesterol content. And yes, I know Mark Sisson says not to fear the fat and its good fat - well, its true, some of it is good fat (nuts, seeds, avocado, coconut) - however there's still saturated fat, and with heart disease still being the biggest killer in our generation - I'm not going to risk my heart health because some dude on the net assures me on his blog that its ok. Yes we need some saturated fat and 'bad'cholesterol (to transport fat to the certain organs that need its protection ie the heart and kidneys). But we need a higher unsaturated/saturated fat ratio in our diets. And since he puts animal fats (or saturated) so high up on his foods to eat, it IS scary to me.
Plus - all the treats that are on the Paleo blogs now - they are nice to look at and drool over, but are extremely high in calories, so its hard to figure out if people are doing it for their health or because its a new "fad" in the diet industry?
SO - where does that leave us. Somewhere in the middle. We like the idea of eating clean and putting good stuff into our body, but without heaps of animal fats and calories. I still like the idea of having chick peas in our diet, I think they offer a great deal nutritionally (and even Mark puts them in his sometimes foods, along with chocolate and wine) so I think we will have our own version of Paleo/Primal, however, it will be our Melcra lifestyle.
So far we haven't discussed too much (Elf Man has been busy with assignments and stuff) but we agreed on the sweeteners we would allow - pure maple syrup (not maple syrup flavouring!), honey and coconut palm sugar. Coconut palm sugar is a super food that is low gi, so we think its a wise choice above all other sweeteners.
Basically, we will make as much of our own stuff as possible, I'll make paleo treats for the kids instead of the rubbish I usually buy them at the shops (goodbye tiny teddies, fruit bars, fruit rolls, muesli bars) and I'll also continue to make my own butter and yoghurt - at least cutting down on some of the preservatives in their diet.
And I thought I would make things out of spelt grain instead of wheat, and see if that helps Coo's bloating issues that she has. This may be a Whole30 challenge, but I think its also challenging the way that we look and feel about food.
Anyway, thats the latest crap that has been flying around my head!
Wednesday, 22 August 2012
Day 10
Quick rundown for the day!
Breakfast - grain free cereal with banana and almond milk.
Morning tea - boiled egg
Lunch - chicken and salad - cos lettuce, cucumber, grapes, cashews - with orange juice and olive oil as a dressing
Afternoon tea - some dried fruit - evn though I said no dried fruit. I'm weak when hungry.
Dinner - Moroccan beef and cauliflower rice. One if the best dishes so far!
Breakfast - grain free cereal with banana and almond milk.
Morning tea - boiled egg
Lunch - chicken and salad - cos lettuce, cucumber, grapes, cashews - with orange juice and olive oil as a dressing
Afternoon tea - some dried fruit - evn though I said no dried fruit. I'm weak when hungry.
Dinner - Moroccan beef and cauliflower rice. One if the best dishes so far!
Tuesday, 21 August 2012
Day 9
Day 9!
Today I promised myself not to have any dried fruit. So NO MORE DRIED FRUIT MEL! Seriously, it gives me a belly ache and bad gas, so NO MORE. Dried apricots - our love affair is now over. Goodbye.
Anyhoo.
Breakfast:
We were supposed to have green smoothies for breakfast, however Elf Man didn't put any ice cube trays in the freezer so we had to improvise. I didn't have enough almond milk for our cereal so I threw together some eggs, spring onion, baby spinach - and some fruit.
Then that got me through to morning tea - around 11am - and so I did some cashew hommus up and had that with carrot sticks. No picture was taken though, but it was super nice so I'm sure I will make it again!
Lunch:
Paleo chicken soup that I made last week and stuck in the freezer. I had a late lunch (after 1.30pm) so didn't need anything else with it.
Afternoon tea:
I didn't eat anything for afternoon tea because I worked out on the cross trainer instead.
Dinner:
Roast chicken and vegies! Yum. No pic cos it wouldn't upload it, but who hasn't seen a pic of roast chook and vegies?
Monday, 20 August 2012
Day 8
Very small entry this time!
Breakfast we had our grain free cereal like last Monday, and had half a banana and some chunks of apple on top of it, with almond milk.
Morning tea I had a boiled egg.
Lunch was my tuna balls in lettuce cups again.
Afternoon tea - I made some date/almond/coconut oil/shredded coconut combination and was snacking on that. And yes there is still some left over.
Dinner:
Cauliflower fried rice :)
Elf Man also made up some sorbet for dessert - no sugar - just some oranges, ice cubes and frozen blueberries.
Breakfast we had our grain free cereal like last Monday, and had half a banana and some chunks of apple on top of it, with almond milk.
Morning tea I had a boiled egg.
Lunch was my tuna balls in lettuce cups again.
Afternoon tea - I made some date/almond/coconut oil/shredded coconut combination and was snacking on that. And yes there is still some left over.
Dinner:
Cauliflower fried rice :)
Elf Man also made up some sorbet for dessert - no sugar - just some oranges, ice cubes and frozen blueberries.
Sunday, 19 August 2012
Day 7
This morning we were up early (even though I hardly slept all night due to Bubbles) and we quickly made breakfast (weetbix for the non-paleo members, and a green smoothie for the paleo people).
Then we were off to the markets and stocked up on a LOT of fresh fruit and vegetables.
Then we headed up the coast to Elf Man's parents house for a family lunch. None of them knew about the challenge so it was interesting the looks we copped from a few of them ;)
So while everyone sat down to morning tea of biscuits (lots of different yummy biscuits), Elf man and I sat down to some fresh fruit that we just got from the market.
Then while everyone was eating lots of yummy stuff for lunch (lasagna, some pasta thingy, rice, some peas and corn and chicken casserole stuff) we ate a salad, thrown together from my bags from the market. We didn't have any nuts so I quickly steamed some sweet potato in the microwave and chucked that in.
Then for afternoon tea - omg - the feast that was on the table. Chocolate cake with thick icing, date and walnut loaf, potato chips, after dinner mints, muffins - I was drooling over the after dinner mints, but I would not be tempted. We didn't feel like fruit again, so we pinched two eggs from Elf Man's mum, boiled them up and had one each while everyone (including the kids) pigged out around us. We also drank black tea since I forgot to bring my almond milk.
So I think we did rather well at resisting the temptations and not cheating on our challenge.
And for dinner - paleo BLT's, sweet potato chips and some broccoli cos I thought the plate needed some colour. OMG. SO FREAKIN' YUMMY!!!!!! I love this eating challenge.
We also weighed ourselves this morning for our normal Sunday weigh in. Results!
Current weight: 79.5kg (yeeha baby under 80!)
Total weight lost so far: 21.5kg.
Then we were off to the markets and stocked up on a LOT of fresh fruit and vegetables.
Then we headed up the coast to Elf Man's parents house for a family lunch. None of them knew about the challenge so it was interesting the looks we copped from a few of them ;)
So while everyone sat down to morning tea of biscuits (lots of different yummy biscuits), Elf man and I sat down to some fresh fruit that we just got from the market.
Then while everyone was eating lots of yummy stuff for lunch (lasagna, some pasta thingy, rice, some peas and corn and chicken casserole stuff) we ate a salad, thrown together from my bags from the market. We didn't have any nuts so I quickly steamed some sweet potato in the microwave and chucked that in.
Then for afternoon tea - omg - the feast that was on the table. Chocolate cake with thick icing, date and walnut loaf, potato chips, after dinner mints, muffins - I was drooling over the after dinner mints, but I would not be tempted. We didn't feel like fruit again, so we pinched two eggs from Elf Man's mum, boiled them up and had one each while everyone (including the kids) pigged out around us. We also drank black tea since I forgot to bring my almond milk.
So I think we did rather well at resisting the temptations and not cheating on our challenge.
And for dinner - paleo BLT's, sweet potato chips and some broccoli cos I thought the plate needed some colour. OMG. SO FREAKIN' YUMMY!!!!!! I love this eating challenge.
We also weighed ourselves this morning for our normal Sunday weigh in. Results!
Current weight: 79.5kg (yeeha baby under 80!)
Total weight lost so far: 21.5kg.
Saturday, 18 August 2012
Day 6
Day 6! Nearly a week on the Whole 30, and I've also noticed a few things, health wise. My bloating is nearly non-existent, and my nose (which has been blocked for the last 2 and a half years) is now unblocked and I can sleep with my mouth closed now! That's pretty amazing I think - coincidence? Maybe not.
Ok, on to what I ate for today.
Breakfast:
Big fry up of crispy bacon, mushrooms, spinach and tomato. Also poached an egg, it was bloody nice and kept me full for ages.
Morning tea:
An apple and an orange.
Lunch:
Salad with some cashews and a poached egg on top. Probably bad that I had two eggs today, but we didn't have any meat out, and we are running low on food at the moment!
Afternoon tea:
Didn't have because I was at a kid's birthday party with Sparrow for a few hours. Resisted the lovely looking cake on offer and resisted the coffee with cows milk.
Dinner:
Slow cooker beef and sweet potato stew with some pumpkin, carrots, zucchini and broccoli. Yum.
Weigh in day tomorrow. Will be interesting. Also lunch with Elf Man's family - so I'm planning on steaming up some chicken before we leave in the morning (or at their place if I don't get time beforehand) and dropping into the markets on the way to their place to stock up on salad and lots of fresh fruit for dessert. No tempting me!
Ok, on to what I ate for today.
Breakfast:
Big fry up of crispy bacon, mushrooms, spinach and tomato. Also poached an egg, it was bloody nice and kept me full for ages.
Morning tea:
An apple and an orange.
Lunch:
Salad with some cashews and a poached egg on top. Probably bad that I had two eggs today, but we didn't have any meat out, and we are running low on food at the moment!
Afternoon tea:
Didn't have because I was at a kid's birthday party with Sparrow for a few hours. Resisted the lovely looking cake on offer and resisted the coffee with cows milk.
Dinner:
Slow cooker beef and sweet potato stew with some pumpkin, carrots, zucchini and broccoli. Yum.
Weigh in day tomorrow. Will be interesting. Also lunch with Elf Man's family - so I'm planning on steaming up some chicken before we leave in the morning (or at their place if I don't get time beforehand) and dropping into the markets on the way to their place to stock up on salad and lots of fresh fruit for dessert. No tempting me!
Friday, 17 August 2012
Day 5
Quick one for day 5.
Breakfast:
Made a no oat oatmeal this morning for breakfast that I found on the net. Was pretty yummy, tasted nothing like porridge whatsoever - but still, tasted a bit like banana cake. Which was yum.
Morning tea:
My sister came over with lots of fruit, so I had some fresh grapes, strawberries, blueberries and an apple.
Lunch:
Leftover cabbage rolls from last night.
Dinner:
Salmon omelette (was supposed to follow a recipe but my computer crashed, so I just made it up and it was delicious!) and a salad. I added blueberries to my salad, cos thats just how I roll.
Had some other snack type things during the day - dried apricots, sultanas, a piece of ham, just lots of little things.
Bring on day 6!
Breakfast:
Made a no oat oatmeal this morning for breakfast that I found on the net. Was pretty yummy, tasted nothing like porridge whatsoever - but still, tasted a bit like banana cake. Which was yum.
Morning tea:
My sister came over with lots of fruit, so I had some fresh grapes, strawberries, blueberries and an apple.
Lunch:
Leftover cabbage rolls from last night.
Dinner:
Salmon omelette (was supposed to follow a recipe but my computer crashed, so I just made it up and it was delicious!) and a salad. I added blueberries to my salad, cos thats just how I roll.
Had some other snack type things during the day - dried apricots, sultanas, a piece of ham, just lots of little things.
Bring on day 6!
Thursday, 16 August 2012
Day 4
Day 4 of the challenge!
Breakfast was grain free cereal again with almond milk. No picture necessary obviously cos we've already had it this week!
Morning tea I had a lovely friend drop in for coffee (well, she had coffee and milk, I had tea with almond milk) and I had a couple of lemon balls.
Lunch I had leftover pineapple coleslaw from last night, plus some chicken that I had cooked the other day, and I threw in some cashews as well. Then I had a small banana from my mum's banana tree.
Afternoon tea. I can't remember. LOL
Dinner! Slow cooked cabbage rolls and cauliflower rice on the side. It was SUPER yummy. Very impressed with that dish.
Then we had some strawberry and kiwi fruit sorbet that Elf Man made last night - no sugar, just fruit and ice cubes.
Need to make some more almond milk because we have none left! We're going through a litre or so every couple of days I think, more than I expected for just cereal and teas.
Health wise - I'm feeling good, still chirpy and still haven't lost my shit with the kids which is well, unusual LOL... I've also had some loose err movements, so I'm guessing my body is clearing out the old stuff. Also had a slight headache today (which I have read is normal at this stage) and felt a little bit sick this morning, but it passed quickly and luckily I didn't vomit from it.
All good stuff! Bring on day 5. Time to look for new recipes to try next week!
Breakfast was grain free cereal again with almond milk. No picture necessary obviously cos we've already had it this week!
Morning tea I had a lovely friend drop in for coffee (well, she had coffee and milk, I had tea with almond milk) and I had a couple of lemon balls.
Lunch I had leftover pineapple coleslaw from last night, plus some chicken that I had cooked the other day, and I threw in some cashews as well. Then I had a small banana from my mum's banana tree.
Afternoon tea. I can't remember. LOL
Dinner! Slow cooked cabbage rolls and cauliflower rice on the side. It was SUPER yummy. Very impressed with that dish.
Then we had some strawberry and kiwi fruit sorbet that Elf Man made last night - no sugar, just fruit and ice cubes.
Need to make some more almond milk because we have none left! We're going through a litre or so every couple of days I think, more than I expected for just cereal and teas.
Health wise - I'm feeling good, still chirpy and still haven't lost my shit with the kids which is well, unusual LOL... I've also had some loose err movements, so I'm guessing my body is clearing out the old stuff. Also had a slight headache today (which I have read is normal at this stage) and felt a little bit sick this morning, but it passed quickly and luckily I didn't vomit from it.
All good stuff! Bring on day 5. Time to look for new recipes to try next week!
Wednesday, 15 August 2012
Day 3
Day 3 - had a better night's sleep last night, think I'm sleeping deeper for the small amount of time that I do sleep, maybe its because my sciatic wasn't playing up last night.
Anyway, I was on fire today, had made the kid's dinner by lunch time, and was pretty happy all day.
Today's meals were:
Breakfast:
Raw fruit cereal with almond milk.
Morning tea:
Fruit platter shared with the Coo and Speedy.
Lunch:
Lettuce cups (I'm really liking the lettuce cups if you can't tell) with chicken in one, ham in the other - and both had cucumber, grated beetroot and bean sprouts on them.
Afternoon tea - I didn't have because I exercised on the treadmill.
Dinner:
A pork chop and pineapple coleslaw. Which if you got past the cabbage taste, was actually really yummy.
So I exercised, treadmill again since our cross trainer is in a few pieces at the moment, and I walked at speed 5 for two minutes, jogged (I'd like to say ran but it was only at 7.5 speed) for 20 minutes, walked again for 3 minutes, and then jogged the last 5 at 7.5 speed again. I was absolutely buggered.
That's it for today. No damage from yesterday's dried fruit pig out - unless you include my extremely unpleasant gas. But no damage weight wise.
Anyway, I was on fire today, had made the kid's dinner by lunch time, and was pretty happy all day.
Today's meals were:
Breakfast:
Raw fruit cereal with almond milk.
Morning tea:
Fruit platter shared with the Coo and Speedy.
Lunch:
Lettuce cups (I'm really liking the lettuce cups if you can't tell) with chicken in one, ham in the other - and both had cucumber, grated beetroot and bean sprouts on them.
Afternoon tea - I didn't have because I exercised on the treadmill.
Dinner:
A pork chop and pineapple coleslaw. Which if you got past the cabbage taste, was actually really yummy.
So I exercised, treadmill again since our cross trainer is in a few pieces at the moment, and I walked at speed 5 for two minutes, jogged (I'd like to say ran but it was only at 7.5 speed) for 20 minutes, walked again for 3 minutes, and then jogged the last 5 at 7.5 speed again. I was absolutely buggered.
That's it for today. No damage from yesterday's dried fruit pig out - unless you include my extremely unpleasant gas. But no damage weight wise.
Tuesday, 14 August 2012
Day 2
Day 2 of our Whole 30 challenge. Still feeling good, even did some exercise today, did intervals (walking at 5, running at 9 - incline of 2) on the treadmill for half an hour.
This is what our meal plan was today.
Breakfast:
Dairy free green smoothie from here:
http://quirkycooking.blogspot.com.au/2011/10/green-chocolate-smoothie-dairy-free.html
However, I didn't use rapadura (obviously since no sugars are allowed!) but instead I threw in a handful of frozen blueberries instead to help sweeten it. Was delicious, and the kids loved it too.
Morning tea was a lemon ball and a protein ball like I had yesterday.
Lunch:
For lunch I had homemade chicken soup (with homemade chicken stock) and because I usually have crackers or toast with it - I felt like I needed something crunchy with it. So I grabbed a lettuce leaf, cut the side off a cucumber, and a small piece of chicken that I cooked up last night. Rolled it up - and that took place of my crackers.
Then I had a protein ball because the kids had tiny teddies and they looked really nice! Then I had some sultanas and a banana later on.
Dinner:
Had a cauliflower, bacon and cashew curry. Was nice and easy to make, and was quite tasty. A bit hot for my liking and then it wasn't until after I used the curry powder that I discovered that one of the ingredients was rice flour. I'm sure it would be minimal, but I'm disappointed that I didn't think to look first!
Day two over and done with, and not going too bad. Have to watch my consumption of dried fruit though, easy to overdo it - today it was sultanas and dried apricots in the afternoon and before dinner because I was hungry. So I'm not having any tomorrow, nor am I having any lemon balls or protein balls.
Tonight I have had extreme rumblings in my belly, and poor Elf Man has had the displeasure of my very rumbly belly turning into lots and LOTS of stinky gas. Was it that little bit of rice flour that set it off or too much dried fruit? Hard to say.
I am NOT having dried fruit tomorrow.
This is what our meal plan was today.
Breakfast:
Dairy free green smoothie from here:
http://quirkycooking.blogspot.com.au/2011/10/green-chocolate-smoothie-dairy-free.html
However, I didn't use rapadura (obviously since no sugars are allowed!) but instead I threw in a handful of frozen blueberries instead to help sweeten it. Was delicious, and the kids loved it too.
Morning tea was a lemon ball and a protein ball like I had yesterday.
Lunch:
For lunch I had homemade chicken soup (with homemade chicken stock) and because I usually have crackers or toast with it - I felt like I needed something crunchy with it. So I grabbed a lettuce leaf, cut the side off a cucumber, and a small piece of chicken that I cooked up last night. Rolled it up - and that took place of my crackers.
Then I had a protein ball because the kids had tiny teddies and they looked really nice! Then I had some sultanas and a banana later on.
Dinner:
Had a cauliflower, bacon and cashew curry. Was nice and easy to make, and was quite tasty. A bit hot for my liking and then it wasn't until after I used the curry powder that I discovered that one of the ingredients was rice flour. I'm sure it would be minimal, but I'm disappointed that I didn't think to look first!
Day two over and done with, and not going too bad. Have to watch my consumption of dried fruit though, easy to overdo it - today it was sultanas and dried apricots in the afternoon and before dinner because I was hungry. So I'm not having any tomorrow, nor am I having any lemon balls or protein balls.
Tonight I have had extreme rumblings in my belly, and poor Elf Man has had the displeasure of my very rumbly belly turning into lots and LOTS of stinky gas. Was it that little bit of rice flour that set it off or too much dried fruit? Hard to say.
I am NOT having dried fruit tomorrow.
Monday, 13 August 2012
The Whole hog
Ok, so we started the Whole 30 challenge today - a Paleo challenge. We finally decided to take the leap into it, its only for 30 days, so we'll see where it takes us. I'll blog what we are eating just in case I make a dish I really like, so I can remember it - my memory is shocking.
So for breakfast we had a grain free cereal. I got the recipe from here: http://www.staceyspaleokitchen.com/2011/01/no-grain-granola.html
I forgot to put the dried fruit in though at the end (doh!) and I substituted the vanilla with an extra date.
So I also made almond milk this morning, so we had grain free cereal, almond milk and a banana on top. The almond milk made it all gluggy like instead of like cereal, but it was still nice. I do prefer it with yoghurt though.
Then I went out in time for morning tea, so I took my protein balls and lemon balls that I had made with me. I also took a green tea bag with me, so had that too.
Then lunch was tuna balls in lettuce cups with fresh beetroot grated over the top, carrot and celery sticks, and a few grapes. Those little tuna balls pack a punch and kept me full right up until dinner tonight!
Speaking of dinner, we had barramundi cooked in the oven, although I'm not very good and some of our fish was undercooked - blerrrgh. We also had a brussel sprouts and bacon dish, which was ok, I think I only liked it because I luuuuurve bacon.
I also made up some icy poles today, with watermelon and pineapple juice, so we will see if they turn out ok. Oh and I also snacked on some sultanas and dried apricots - just a couple.
So anyway, that was day one of the Whole 30 - 29 days left to go.
My weigh in yesterday was ok, only a loss of 500g this week - so now my current weight is...
Current weight: 81.1kg.
Total weight loss: 18.9kg.
So for breakfast we had a grain free cereal. I got the recipe from here: http://www.staceyspaleokitchen.com/2011/01/no-grain-granola.html
I forgot to put the dried fruit in though at the end (doh!) and I substituted the vanilla with an extra date.
So I also made almond milk this morning, so we had grain free cereal, almond milk and a banana on top. The almond milk made it all gluggy like instead of like cereal, but it was still nice. I do prefer it with yoghurt though.
Then I went out in time for morning tea, so I took my protein balls and lemon balls that I had made with me. I also took a green tea bag with me, so had that too.
Then lunch was tuna balls in lettuce cups with fresh beetroot grated over the top, carrot and celery sticks, and a few grapes. Those little tuna balls pack a punch and kept me full right up until dinner tonight!
Speaking of dinner, we had barramundi cooked in the oven, although I'm not very good and some of our fish was undercooked - blerrrgh. We also had a brussel sprouts and bacon dish, which was ok, I think I only liked it because I luuuuurve bacon.
I also made up some icy poles today, with watermelon and pineapple juice, so we will see if they turn out ok. Oh and I also snacked on some sultanas and dried apricots - just a couple.
So anyway, that was day one of the Whole 30 - 29 days left to go.
My weigh in yesterday was ok, only a loss of 500g this week - so now my current weight is...
Current weight: 81.1kg.
Total weight loss: 18.9kg.
Monday, 6 August 2012
This week's result
Almost forgot to update with my weigh in results yesterday!
Loss of 1.2kg this week.
Current weight: 81.6kg
Weight lost to date: 18.4kg
(although technically its over 21kg lost since I was 103kg in March!)
Loss of 1.2kg this week.
Current weight: 81.6kg
Weight lost to date: 18.4kg
(although technically its over 21kg lost since I was 103kg in March!)
Tuesday, 31 July 2012
The little things to remember
Losing weight is such a huge (hate to use the word!) journey, you come across so many things along the way and I think its important to take note of them.
I weigh the same now as I did when I first met Elf Man. I still remember sitting in my bedroom, listening to music, getting extremely drunk - with this extremely TALL man I had met on the internet and that was the first time I had met him in real life.
As I had been left with no self-confidence in my first marriage (which had ended only 3 months before!) I asked Elf Man if he was disappointed with how I looked, since you know, I was ugly and 83kg so not slim.
He told me - and I remember it like it was yesterday - that he thought I was "fuckin' hot actually'.
How those little compliments stay with you - just an off the cuff comment I'm sure by him, but it meant so much to me to hear those three little words. It was like someone had given me the best gift ever, after living with someone for over 5 years and continuously feeling bad about myself, that I was ugly, not worthy of love, not worthy of sex - it took basically a random stranger to turn it all around. Of course, he might just have been pissed, or just trying to get into bed with me........
*cough cough*
So while I'm the same weight now, and my body definitely doesn't look the same after 4 babies in 4 years - its nice to remember this weight in a good way, and not just that I have 17kg to go to get to my goal.
If only one person in the world finds you beautiful (or, you know, fuckin' hot), it doesn't really matter what anyone else thinks, because you'll always have that to hold close to your heart.
(Ps....and marry that person so you can hear it often heehee)
I weigh the same now as I did when I first met Elf Man. I still remember sitting in my bedroom, listening to music, getting extremely drunk - with this extremely TALL man I had met on the internet and that was the first time I had met him in real life.
As I had been left with no self-confidence in my first marriage (which had ended only 3 months before!) I asked Elf Man if he was disappointed with how I looked, since you know, I was ugly and 83kg so not slim.
He told me - and I remember it like it was yesterday - that he thought I was "fuckin' hot actually'.
How those little compliments stay with you - just an off the cuff comment I'm sure by him, but it meant so much to me to hear those three little words. It was like someone had given me the best gift ever, after living with someone for over 5 years and continuously feeling bad about myself, that I was ugly, not worthy of love, not worthy of sex - it took basically a random stranger to turn it all around. Of course, he might just have been pissed, or just trying to get into bed with me........
*cough cough*
So while I'm the same weight now, and my body definitely doesn't look the same after 4 babies in 4 years - its nice to remember this weight in a good way, and not just that I have 17kg to go to get to my goal.
If only one person in the world finds you beautiful (or, you know, fuckin' hot), it doesn't really matter what anyone else thinks, because you'll always have that to hold close to your heart.
(Ps....and marry that person so you can hear it often heehee)
Sunday, 29 July 2012
Slack arse!
That's what I am. A total slack arse with updating this blog (and my other one for that matter)
So it was 3 months on the 23rd and I was 84kg - so 16kg lost in that time, not too bad! I weighed in today as well, now 82.8kg so have officially lost 20kg from my fattest weight (not e starting the melcra diet though).
So there have been a few changes since I last posted, back on mfp now - figured I would do it till I reach a heathy weight - ie not still in the obese category! Since I'm such a short arse I'm pretty sure I'm still considered obese.
I started going gluten free today as well, hopefully this will help my bloating of a night time go away. Only time will tell.
So my eating today has been ok, some fruit for breakfast cos I didn't have anything else in the house, skipped morning tea cos I went to collect some secondhand Spot books, so had corn thins for lunch with spinach, ham, cheese and tomato, then some new Vegie chips for afternoon tea. Having some kebabs for dinner with chicken, mushroom, onion, capsicum and zucchini - and some other vegies on the side! Can't wait. Nothing better than eating fresh healthy food!
With a side of homemade choc orange choc chip ice cream for dessert......
Current weight: 82.8kg
Total weight loss: 17.2kg
Weight to lose to get to goal: 17.8kg
So it was 3 months on the 23rd and I was 84kg - so 16kg lost in that time, not too bad! I weighed in today as well, now 82.8kg so have officially lost 20kg from my fattest weight (not e starting the melcra diet though).
So there have been a few changes since I last posted, back on mfp now - figured I would do it till I reach a heathy weight - ie not still in the obese category! Since I'm such a short arse I'm pretty sure I'm still considered obese.
I started going gluten free today as well, hopefully this will help my bloating of a night time go away. Only time will tell.
So my eating today has been ok, some fruit for breakfast cos I didn't have anything else in the house, skipped morning tea cos I went to collect some secondhand Spot books, so had corn thins for lunch with spinach, ham, cheese and tomato, then some new Vegie chips for afternoon tea. Having some kebabs for dinner with chicken, mushroom, onion, capsicum and zucchini - and some other vegies on the side! Can't wait. Nothing better than eating fresh healthy food!
With a side of homemade choc orange choc chip ice cream for dessert......
Current weight: 82.8kg
Total weight loss: 17.2kg
Weight to lose to get to goal: 17.8kg
Tuesday, 10 July 2012
Catching up and starting afresh
Thought it was time for a catch up!
I have been tracking my calories in both My Fitness Pal app and Calorie King (extra help when I can't find what I'm looking for with MFP). The problem that I was finding was that I was subconsciously not eating a lot during the day and I would be left with a big lot of calories (around 300 - 400) to consume after dinner! So instead of my healthy food choices that I first set out to eat on the Melcra lifestyle diet, I found myself eating lots of rice crackers to get the numbers up or some biscuits with my tea.
Its not the way we started out, nor is it the routine that we wanted to get into, so I've dumped the MFP (will still track my weight loss in there though) and going back to basics. Food that I will consume will be good food, food to help my body run better and I'll eat when hungry, not set times.
So yesterday I had my lovely green smoothie for breakfast which I haven't had for a while, and I have missed it! Today I had an porridge sachet for breakfast, vegemite on premium crackers for morning tea, chicken soup for lunch and piece of bread (which I think I will start making my own bread again so it at least tastes nicer, even if I freeze it and only have a piece with my soup), I made a muesli slice type of thing for afternoon tea so I had some of that, and then for dinner I'm having chicken and vegetable stir fry (snow peas, red and green capsicum, onion, garlic, egg noodles, ginger and some sauces - lots of chilli sauce!).
I'll make some more protein balls tomorrow or lemon balls - so my basic diet is sort of paleo-like but not really, because I'm still having yoghurt and milk in my coffee and teas. Plus I do still have rice a few times a month, and pasta - but I'm thinking of trying cauliflower rice instead of normal rice - just to give it a go!
Anyway - that's where I'm at - at the moment anyway.
Current weight: 86.7kg
total weight loss to date: 13.3kg
I have been tracking my calories in both My Fitness Pal app and Calorie King (extra help when I can't find what I'm looking for with MFP). The problem that I was finding was that I was subconsciously not eating a lot during the day and I would be left with a big lot of calories (around 300 - 400) to consume after dinner! So instead of my healthy food choices that I first set out to eat on the Melcra lifestyle diet, I found myself eating lots of rice crackers to get the numbers up or some biscuits with my tea.
Its not the way we started out, nor is it the routine that we wanted to get into, so I've dumped the MFP (will still track my weight loss in there though) and going back to basics. Food that I will consume will be good food, food to help my body run better and I'll eat when hungry, not set times.
So yesterday I had my lovely green smoothie for breakfast which I haven't had for a while, and I have missed it! Today I had an porridge sachet for breakfast, vegemite on premium crackers for morning tea, chicken soup for lunch and piece of bread (which I think I will start making my own bread again so it at least tastes nicer, even if I freeze it and only have a piece with my soup), I made a muesli slice type of thing for afternoon tea so I had some of that, and then for dinner I'm having chicken and vegetable stir fry (snow peas, red and green capsicum, onion, garlic, egg noodles, ginger and some sauces - lots of chilli sauce!).
I'll make some more protein balls tomorrow or lemon balls - so my basic diet is sort of paleo-like but not really, because I'm still having yoghurt and milk in my coffee and teas. Plus I do still have rice a few times a month, and pasta - but I'm thinking of trying cauliflower rice instead of normal rice - just to give it a go!
Anyway - that's where I'm at - at the moment anyway.
Current weight: 86.7kg
total weight loss to date: 13.3kg
Sunday, 24 June 2012
Second month weigh in
Ok so 2 months now have gone by that I've been on the Melcra lifestyle diet and I've lost 10.8kg.
I think this has to be the easiest "diet" ever, its just making good choices for fueling your body instead of craptastic food that does nothing for you (even though it tastes super yummy and I did have a fleeting craving for pizza the other night!)
Current weight: 89.2kg
Total weight lost: 10.8kg
I think this has to be the easiest "diet" ever, its just making good choices for fueling your body instead of craptastic food that does nothing for you (even though it tastes super yummy and I did have a fleeting craving for pizza the other night!)
Current weight: 89.2kg
Total weight lost: 10.8kg
Sunday, 17 June 2012
Putting the fun back into exercise
Sunday is a good day to have a rest of exercise, sometimes during the week doing it every day gets a bit boring and sometimes you just can't be stuffed doing it.
So today was supposed to be our rest day, both Elf Man and I burnt up a good amount of calories yesterday on the cross trainer so we didn't really want to do much today. So instead, we took the kids down to the "park" and had some of their balls and just kicked them around and ran after each other. Other than Speedy and Bubbles being clingy for some of it, I had a really good time. We also did a lap around the oval (because it wasn't really a park with swings, just a running oval with lots of space) and that was difficult to do whilst holding Speedy's hand! It actually felt good just to be silly and run around and kick a ball, and not be concerned as to how many calories I was burning.
In fact, it felt so good - we decided to do it every week as a family. Hopefully it will bring us closer together as a family too.
So that was our exercise for today, tomorrow its back to jogging/walking at 6am with my walking buddy!
Was also a weigh in day today (normal Sunday weigh in) and here are the results:
Current weight: 89.7kg (finally made it into the 80's even if its only just scraping in!)
Total weight lost: 10.3kg
Yah! Go you big red fire engine!
So today was supposed to be our rest day, both Elf Man and I burnt up a good amount of calories yesterday on the cross trainer so we didn't really want to do much today. So instead, we took the kids down to the "park" and had some of their balls and just kicked them around and ran after each other. Other than Speedy and Bubbles being clingy for some of it, I had a really good time. We also did a lap around the oval (because it wasn't really a park with swings, just a running oval with lots of space) and that was difficult to do whilst holding Speedy's hand! It actually felt good just to be silly and run around and kick a ball, and not be concerned as to how many calories I was burning.
In fact, it felt so good - we decided to do it every week as a family. Hopefully it will bring us closer together as a family too.
So that was our exercise for today, tomorrow its back to jogging/walking at 6am with my walking buddy!
Was also a weigh in day today (normal Sunday weigh in) and here are the results:
Current weight: 89.7kg (finally made it into the 80's even if its only just scraping in!)
Total weight lost: 10.3kg
Yah! Go you big red fire engine!
Sunday, 10 June 2012
Another week, another weigh in
Another week gone, this one implementing our new eating habits - ie, eating after the kids go to bed instead of having dinner at 5pm and then snacking all night till we go to bed. So far it's working really well, I've stopped snacking and just have a cup of coffee usually when the kids have their dinner. Well, not that they eat, it should say "when I make dinner for the kids and they bitch and moan about how they don't want to eat it".
Anyway, a better weigh in this week - woohoo! I've also been getting up in the morning while it's still dark and going for a walk with my new walking buddy. It's so much easier to force yourself out of bed on this cold mornings when you know someone is waiting for you! So I've been doing that exercise, I'm happy if I get bit of exercise every day, no matter how little, the main reason for doing this is to get fit not necessarily just to get skinny. No good being skinny if you still can't run around with the kids because your cardiovascular fitness is up to shit.
Current weight: 91.1kg
Total lost so far: 8.9kg
Bring on this week!
Anyway, a better weigh in this week - woohoo! I've also been getting up in the morning while it's still dark and going for a walk with my new walking buddy. It's so much easier to force yourself out of bed on this cold mornings when you know someone is waiting for you! So I've been doing that exercise, I'm happy if I get bit of exercise every day, no matter how little, the main reason for doing this is to get fit not necessarily just to get skinny. No good being skinny if you still can't run around with the kids because your cardiovascular fitness is up to shit.
Current weight: 91.1kg
Total lost so far: 8.9kg
Bring on this week!
Monday, 4 June 2012
When scales go bad
Ok so this week I gained weight. I know why. I snack of a night time. We have dinner at 5pm with the kids and by the time 7.30 or 8pm rolls around I am bloody starving!
So instead of admitting defeat as my past self would have done, Elf Man and I have come up with a new plan.
We will feed the kids at 5pm and one of us will exercise. The other sits down with the kids and has a cuppa or a banana or something. Our dinner time is now at 7.30 to try and stop those nightly bingings.
It worked last night, dinner at 7.30 and a little bit of ice cream at 8.30, cup of tea at 9.30.
Hopefully this new plan wil keep my exercise regular, it's hard to exercise at night when The Baby has been unsettled and waking all the time. By the way, The Baby will now affectionately be known as Bubbles.
So with my weight gain this week - if it's not working, change it!
current weight: 93.5
So instead of admitting defeat as my past self would have done, Elf Man and I have come up with a new plan.
We will feed the kids at 5pm and one of us will exercise. The other sits down with the kids and has a cuppa or a banana or something. Our dinner time is now at 7.30 to try and stop those nightly bingings.
It worked last night, dinner at 7.30 and a little bit of ice cream at 8.30, cup of tea at 9.30.
Hopefully this new plan wil keep my exercise regular, it's hard to exercise at night when The Baby has been unsettled and waking all the time. By the way, The Baby will now affectionately be known as Bubbles.
So with my weight gain this week - if it's not working, change it!
current weight: 93.5
Monday, 28 May 2012
My problem with running
I would love to run. I have dreams of one day strapping on my sneakers and heading out for a nice long run, pony tail bouncing happily instead of my jiggling fat.
However, I've realised a problem with my dream. I can't run. Sparrow and I went for a walk the other day and he kept wanting me to run, but aside from the part where I don't want people to see me run because I'm like a big hippo - I also feel like a huge elephant trying to run because I'm so bloody heavy. It takes some serious effort to move my body in anything faster than a walk. Its also painful to move my big elephant body like that.
I love the fact that I am losing weight, but its just not fast enough for me! My head wants me to be skinnier so its easy for me to run, however, my body isn't listening to my head and is losing it at a slower rate. Which I know is the way its supposed to be, slow and steady wins the race and all that - but god it takes a long time to get there!
And there in lies the problem with all my other weight loss efforts. I get discouraged by the sheer amount of time it takes to lose all these kilos and putting them on didn't seem to take as long as taking them off. Of course I've put on all this weight from all my pregnancies, so theoretically its taken about 5 years to get to where I am today and its not going to take me 5 years to take it off.....but I want to be fit and healthy now - not in 10.5 months time!
So there it is - I'm impatient and I want results now. Doesn't everyone? ;)
However, I've realised a problem with my dream. I can't run. Sparrow and I went for a walk the other day and he kept wanting me to run, but aside from the part where I don't want people to see me run because I'm like a big hippo - I also feel like a huge elephant trying to run because I'm so bloody heavy. It takes some serious effort to move my body in anything faster than a walk. Its also painful to move my big elephant body like that.
I love the fact that I am losing weight, but its just not fast enough for me! My head wants me to be skinnier so its easy for me to run, however, my body isn't listening to my head and is losing it at a slower rate. Which I know is the way its supposed to be, slow and steady wins the race and all that - but god it takes a long time to get there!
And there in lies the problem with all my other weight loss efforts. I get discouraged by the sheer amount of time it takes to lose all these kilos and putting them on didn't seem to take as long as taking them off. Of course I've put on all this weight from all my pregnancies, so theoretically its taken about 5 years to get to where I am today and its not going to take me 5 years to take it off.....but I want to be fit and healthy now - not in 10.5 months time!
So there it is - I'm impatient and I want results now. Doesn't everyone? ;)
Sunday, 27 May 2012
Sunday bloody Sunday
Well not really, but it is Sunday, and I love that song and couldn't think of a better title.
Today we went to a friend's daughter's birthday party. It was great, really casual affair, lots of kids and some really nice people. There was some good food and some not so good food. We had both. We figured that this is a lifestyle we are living, not a diet. A diet is something that is usually hard to keep up with, if you go off it then you suffer guilt and at the end of it when you start eating normal food again, you usually gain back the weight. Well, that's how its been for me for most of my life, and I've been dieting on and off since I was 12.
So today we had the good and the bad food, but we didn't beat ourselves up about it. We eat good, healthy, nutritious food to fuel our body 99% of the time. So once in a while, its ok to eat some not so good stuff.
I didn't feel like exercising tonight, but I made myself. Each time I say that I don't feel like doing it, its the exact reason why I should be doing it. Half an hour and I feel much better for it.
We also did our usual Sunday weigh in this morning, and I was *drum roll please*...
Current weight: 93.4kg.
Total weight loss to date: 6.6kg.
Today we went to a friend's daughter's birthday party. It was great, really casual affair, lots of kids and some really nice people. There was some good food and some not so good food. We had both. We figured that this is a lifestyle we are living, not a diet. A diet is something that is usually hard to keep up with, if you go off it then you suffer guilt and at the end of it when you start eating normal food again, you usually gain back the weight. Well, that's how its been for me for most of my life, and I've been dieting on and off since I was 12.
So today we had the good and the bad food, but we didn't beat ourselves up about it. We eat good, healthy, nutritious food to fuel our body 99% of the time. So once in a while, its ok to eat some not so good stuff.
I didn't feel like exercising tonight, but I made myself. Each time I say that I don't feel like doing it, its the exact reason why I should be doing it. Half an hour and I feel much better for it.
We also did our usual Sunday weigh in this morning, and I was *drum roll please*...
Current weight: 93.4kg.
Total weight loss to date: 6.6kg.
Saturday, 26 May 2012
To run your own race
Today I've been thinking about how competitive I am, how I compare myself to others and how disappointed I get within myself if I don't do as well with things as others do. I know its only natural and totally a human being response - but I don't like it.
I don't like it when I see others achieving more in their exercise and I feel jealous. I hate that I feel that, I get down on myself and then I start kicking myself for feeling like that. A sad sorry circle of self hatred and jealousy - and thats got to change.
It's funny, I don't like to compare my own children's achievements with other children, but when it comes to my achievements they mean nothing if they don't seem as good as another persons.
So after my total wake up call this morning that this is what I do - I've given myself a good old talking to, and I'm not going to run someone else's race. This is my weight loss journey, and only mine. Only I can be in charge of how much weight I lose, how much effort I put into it, and I cannot (and will not) compare myself to other people.
I will be proud of my friend's achievements (which I always was proud, it was just followed by my own self loathing crap) and remember that even though my race may be run a bit slower than someone else's - the main thing is that I make it to the finish line as well. Doesn't matter when, it just matters that I make it there.
I've lost weight before - 22kg in 5 months after I had Sparrow. I was 68kg and pretty happy within myself. So thats what I have to compare myself to, my past achievements, not another persons.
I've done it once, I can do it again, and I have to stop hating myself.
I don't like it when I see others achieving more in their exercise and I feel jealous. I hate that I feel that, I get down on myself and then I start kicking myself for feeling like that. A sad sorry circle of self hatred and jealousy - and thats got to change.
It's funny, I don't like to compare my own children's achievements with other children, but when it comes to my achievements they mean nothing if they don't seem as good as another persons.
So after my total wake up call this morning that this is what I do - I've given myself a good old talking to, and I'm not going to run someone else's race. This is my weight loss journey, and only mine. Only I can be in charge of how much weight I lose, how much effort I put into it, and I cannot (and will not) compare myself to other people.
I will be proud of my friend's achievements (which I always was proud, it was just followed by my own self loathing crap) and remember that even though my race may be run a bit slower than someone else's - the main thing is that I make it to the finish line as well. Doesn't matter when, it just matters that I make it there.
I've lost weight before - 22kg in 5 months after I had Sparrow. I was 68kg and pretty happy within myself. So thats what I have to compare myself to, my past achievements, not another persons.
I've done it once, I can do it again, and I have to stop hating myself.
Friday, 25 May 2012
Monthly weigh in
Ok so I'm a few days late, but I did weigh in on the 23rd for my monthly weigh in, pictures were taken for comparison (which I will share when I get down to about 80kg!).
Results were good, one month on the Melcra diet and I'm down to 93.8kg. So a loss of 6.2kg. Plus the most important news, I've dropped down a size in my jeans! No longer a size 18, I can get comfortably into a size 16! I haven't been a 16 in a fair while (before pregnant with Speedy I would guess) so I'm pretty happy with that result after a month.
I've caught myself snacking of a night time though, its a habitual thing. So I'm going to cook up some popcorn (air popped) and snack on that instead of the sultanas and rice thins that I have been eating in huge amounts.
Good stuff to eat yes, but still not good in huge amounts!
I think it takes a while to change a habit, so while I can't change that, I can change how much damage is done to my diet and snack on low calorie stuff instead of the usual chips/chocolate/lollies that I used to snack on.
Oh and I keep forgetting to mention how good Elf Man is looking - he's trimmed down about 17kg from December and needs a woohoo!!! So WOOOHOOO Elf Man, you're doing a great job :)
Results were good, one month on the Melcra diet and I'm down to 93.8kg. So a loss of 6.2kg. Plus the most important news, I've dropped down a size in my jeans! No longer a size 18, I can get comfortably into a size 16! I haven't been a 16 in a fair while (before pregnant with Speedy I would guess) so I'm pretty happy with that result after a month.
I've caught myself snacking of a night time though, its a habitual thing. So I'm going to cook up some popcorn (air popped) and snack on that instead of the sultanas and rice thins that I have been eating in huge amounts.
Good stuff to eat yes, but still not good in huge amounts!
I think it takes a while to change a habit, so while I can't change that, I can change how much damage is done to my diet and snack on low calorie stuff instead of the usual chips/chocolate/lollies that I used to snack on.
Oh and I keep forgetting to mention how good Elf Man is looking - he's trimmed down about 17kg from December and needs a woohoo!!! So WOOOHOOO Elf Man, you're doing a great job :)
Sunday, 20 May 2012
Another weigh in day
This morning was another weigh in day.
Loss of 900g. I'm slowly losing weight, but I'm consistent, which Elf Man says means I'm doing it the right way.
My approach is pretty relaxed to this "diet", I exercise when I want/can (so not every night, just most nights) and my morning walk has pretty much gone because of rough nights with the kids at the moment, and I'm eating normal, good food. Food that fuels your body, not just makes your craving go away - till the next time it comes back!
So far I've been lucky though, I don't crave chocolate at all, and I only crave maccas when I drive past it......
Current weight: 94.6kg
Total weight loss so far: 5.4kg (stoked!!)
Loss of 900g. I'm slowly losing weight, but I'm consistent, which Elf Man says means I'm doing it the right way.
My approach is pretty relaxed to this "diet", I exercise when I want/can (so not every night, just most nights) and my morning walk has pretty much gone because of rough nights with the kids at the moment, and I'm eating normal, good food. Food that fuels your body, not just makes your craving go away - till the next time it comes back!
So far I've been lucky though, I don't crave chocolate at all, and I only crave maccas when I drive past it......
Current weight: 94.6kg
Total weight loss so far: 5.4kg (stoked!!)
Wednesday, 16 May 2012
The power of will power
Today I went out for lunch with my mum at a tavern. They had kids meals for free on Wednesdays - and lucky for us - it was Wednesday. So that moment was pure awesome.
So I flicked through the menu. Most things for lunch were burgers or battered fish, there wasn't a lot of options for someone on a low crap (haha) diet.
So I ordered a chicken wrap. That was the healthiest thing on the menu. So it came, and there was a shitload of cheese in it. So I scraped most of the cheese off and gave it to the baby. That was my semi proud moment right there - not tucking in to all that cheese!
My most ultimate test of will power today was to not eat the chips that my wrap was resting on. God they looked great and the smell! - it was making my mouth water.
So I put most of them on the side on my plate. Then I took four out. I was thinking that I could have four, whats four chips after all.... then I looked at Coo's plate. She had nuggets, chips and salad.
So my will power kicked into gear - and I traded her my chips for her salad. Then I had Speedy's salad as well.
So instead of a full plate of chips, instead of 4 chips - I had salad.
I am super proud of myself. Super dooper proud!
So I flicked through the menu. Most things for lunch were burgers or battered fish, there wasn't a lot of options for someone on a low crap (haha) diet.
So I ordered a chicken wrap. That was the healthiest thing on the menu. So it came, and there was a shitload of cheese in it. So I scraped most of the cheese off and gave it to the baby. That was my semi proud moment right there - not tucking in to all that cheese!
My most ultimate test of will power today was to not eat the chips that my wrap was resting on. God they looked great and the smell! - it was making my mouth water.
So I put most of them on the side on my plate. Then I took four out. I was thinking that I could have four, whats four chips after all.... then I looked at Coo's plate. She had nuggets, chips and salad.
So my will power kicked into gear - and I traded her my chips for her salad. Then I had Speedy's salad as well.
So instead of a full plate of chips, instead of 4 chips - I had salad.
I am super proud of myself. Super dooper proud!
Tuesday, 15 May 2012
Inspiration vs motivation
For all the times that I have tried to diet, and there have been many, I thought that it was all about the inspiration. Inspiration from other people to create the drive to lose weight. I have a few inspirational people in my life at the moment, Selina and Nicki being two of them that are a great inspiration to me with their weight loss.
However, I have discovered that it doesn't seem to matter how much inspiration you are provided with, if you don't create your own motivation to lose weight, then the odds for success probably aren't very high.
So this is my motivation.
Isn't it hideous? This was taken on the 25th March this year. This is my motivation to lose weight. To never be like this again. I've never been as disgusted to look at a picture of myself as I am to look at this one.
So I have the motivation now - this hangs on my fridge so I can see it every time I feel like a snack.
3 weeks in, 4.5kg down - I think its working.
Must be off to go and exercise! Although I was good and didn't have chocolate and lollies today that were on offer - I snacked a lot, so best hop on that bike!
And to keep a record for myself - I'm did 11 sit ups and 8 push ups last night. My aim is to try and do one more the next night. Don't think I'll last too long on that one with the push ups - I'm bloody heavy to try and push off the floor!
However, I have discovered that it doesn't seem to matter how much inspiration you are provided with, if you don't create your own motivation to lose weight, then the odds for success probably aren't very high.
So this is my motivation.
Isn't it hideous? This was taken on the 25th March this year. This is my motivation to lose weight. To never be like this again. I've never been as disgusted to look at a picture of myself as I am to look at this one.
So I have the motivation now - this hangs on my fridge so I can see it every time I feel like a snack.
3 weeks in, 4.5kg down - I think its working.
Must be off to go and exercise! Although I was good and didn't have chocolate and lollies today that were on offer - I snacked a lot, so best hop on that bike!
And to keep a record for myself - I'm did 11 sit ups and 8 push ups last night. My aim is to try and do one more the next night. Don't think I'll last too long on that one with the push ups - I'm bloody heavy to try and push off the floor!
Sunday, 13 May 2012
Mothers day weigh in
Today was mothers day. I wanted to weigh in before going out and probably not eating all that well!
So this week I lost 900g. Not too bad, slow but consistent!
Current weight: 95.5
Total weight loss so far: 4.5kg
Bring on this week!
So this week I lost 900g. Not too bad, slow but consistent!
Current weight: 95.5
Total weight loss so far: 4.5kg
Bring on this week!
Wednesday, 9 May 2012
No excuses!
Watching The Biggest Loser has always been inspiring, the contestants look so good at the finale, its amazing how much work they put into themselves.
So as I was in bed this morning, a little chilly, I so didn't feel like getting up and going for a walk at 6am. But excuses (its too cold, I'm too tired) isn't going to remove my fat butt, so in spite of all that and the fact that I was sooooo unmotivated - I did it anyway.
Got up, went for a walk. Only took 30 minutes and I'm glad I did it. Every step I make in pushing myself is going to make it easier for me tomorrow to get out of bed. I'm creating a new habit in my life, breaking the old ones.
Cos nothing changes, if nothing changes.
So as I was in bed this morning, a little chilly, I so didn't feel like getting up and going for a walk at 6am. But excuses (its too cold, I'm too tired) isn't going to remove my fat butt, so in spite of all that and the fact that I was sooooo unmotivated - I did it anyway.
Got up, went for a walk. Only took 30 minutes and I'm glad I did it. Every step I make in pushing myself is going to make it easier for me tomorrow to get out of bed. I'm creating a new habit in my life, breaking the old ones.
Cos nothing changes, if nothing changes.
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